Tag - love

Just A Work-In-Progress (Linkup)

May 26, 2015

Contentment, faith, God, peace, sanctification

Sometimes I think I act like a fake Christian.

I come on this blog and talk the talk, but then at home, I drop the ball.

I raise my hands to pray, only to turn and go the opposite way.

I say in Jesus’ name, and seconds later, wonder if my name still counts in his book.

I love other people, until it gets inconvenient.

These actions make me feel like an inadequate daughter, a lazy child and a no-good-worthy christian. They make me wonder if Jesus could really love a girl like this?

A girl who is so often just a Christian poser.

While I know Jesus extends me grace (which I gladly receive – in abundance), I still wonder – what rules – the flesh or the Spirit?

I say, “your will be done,” and then say “I don’t know when He will show up.”
I utter, “you have this God,” only to start to worry.
I seek his face, only to come face to face with the fact that he may not be happy with me.

I have looked at God in all the wrong way, because he is not:
a “convenient” Sovereign god.
a “genie-in-a-bottle” god.
a “call-in-case-of-emergency” god.
a “I-see-you-from-afar” god.
or a “I’ll-only-love-you-if-your-good” god.

The truth is, the real truth, the I-have-to-cling-to-it truth is: he is the “I-will-always-be-with-you, the I-will never-leave-you, the you-can’t-do-anything-to-make-me-stop-loving-you GOD.

He is the God who doesn’t see me through the face of my mistakes,
but by through the power of his sacrifice.

It’s as if he simply sees through my inadequacies,
straight into the reflection of his heart.

He fully loves. He doesn’t love when all goes well as I am so prone to do – and so prone to expect him to do – but he loves infinitely, incredibly and unduly.

God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ… Eph. 2:4-5

I am not alive to me. I am dead to me. I am alive to Christ.

In this, he doesn’t call me to be put together, he calls me to be broken apart so that he can do his part. His part is creating me into his work of art.

Today, we walk with a work-in-progress sign on, but tomorrow we won’t need a sign. In heaven, all signs will point to the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit – the complete fulfillment of all meaning. Here, God will be faithful to unveil, us, his greatest completed works of art in his perfect glory.

We won’t have to worry about imperfections, inadequacies or incapabilities, because we will be simply in awe of who he made us to be.

God created the earth and that is astounding. Can you even imagine how astounding we will look as God completes his final strokes? A painting is never completely understood until the very end. It will all become clear.

God is the definition of artistry. We never think of him that way, do we?

All of today, are the small workings of his beauty. Rest, my fellow work-in-progress sign carrier, we will one day be completed.

For by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy. Hebrews 10:14

A HUGE PRAISE:

We just fixed the hacking issue this morning!
Comments have been down for the past week,
but please feel free to comment away!!!
God is good!

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Adventuring with Jesus

May 18, 2015

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, Holy Spirit, Jesus

11 Comments

So many times, I become distracted from the greatest love of my life.

I wake up and say my prayers, only to let the craziness of my day draw me away. I tell God, in the morning all is for him, only to let my goals, children and my schedule repel my heart from him. I feel strong in Jesus, only to let my eyes wander. Then I wonder how much he loves me.

How do I get past living like a yo-yo of faithfulness? It’s like one moment I am high and lifted with God and the next I am down in the dumps.

I can’t help but think, but wonder, what if I kept my heart in a place of continual meditation? Then, would my heart keep him where my mouth professes him to be?

Eyes on Jesus
Eyes on his ways
Eyes on his path
Not on others
Not on the waves
Not on the sea
Not on the pain
Not on the people
Not on the plan
But on him

As we see him, we see our way,
his unique road marked out just for us.

A road that does not conform to
industry standards,
society,
pressures,
norms,
circumstances,
perceptions
or opinions.

It simply conforms us to Him, his will, his peace and his love.
It sends us down roads of renewal and life.

The paths we travel are not the paths of others. So when we look at others paths and compare, we slowly move off of the glowing easy road he designed uniquely for us and quickly move onto a rocky road of hard pursuit.

We become discouraged,
rather than encouraged.

We become angry,
rather than holy.

We become frustrated,
rather than captivated,
because what we thought was our lot – was not.

He always had a unique road laid out for us, but we took our eyes off of him – and onto “them”.

But it’s ok. Everything is ok when you know Jesus.

We pick up our heart from the ground,
and seek our way back to the way that always waits,
always stands,
and that is always at work within us.

The Spirit stands ready to more and more establish us – in Him – Christ Jesus. It stands ready to help us put our best foot forward as we return to the source.

The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. Prov. 16:9

We again place our eyes on him and keep walking towards him,
knowing that when we are in him, we are in his will for us.

Remain in me, as I also remain in you.
No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine.
Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. John 15:4

He will open doors, he will make people listen and he will do all the things that seem impossible.

God can do anything, you know – far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us. Eph. 3:20

There is no where he won’t take us when we are following his ways,
there is no place to wild, no land too incredible, no forest too fantastic,
he travels with us and we are safe.

Our life is his adventure and we are along for the ride.

What unbeaten path are you being called out to? How might God be calling you to continually place your eyes on him?

Enjoyed “Adventuring with Jesus?” Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Following Jesus to Selflessness

May 15, 2015

purposefulfaith

Comparing, Contentment, faith, relationships, Serving

36 Comments

She talked and talked and talked.
I listened and listened and listened.
While my mouth sat still, hers moved a hundred miles a minute.

Would I ever get a chance to speak?
Will she ever ask me about me?

Some people can really talk about themselves – a lot!

As my mind spinned a web of annoyance, God came to undo it with his Spirit. He nudged me to truth.

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. Jo. 14:26

Bring to remembrance. When we remember what Jesus has said to us, done for us and given to us, we suddenly remember what is really important.

Things like: so the last will be first, and the first will be last. Mt. 20:16

Remembering centers our soul on the crucified-and-risen one.

The man who never demanded to be fully known.
The man who never took the road of delight, entertainment or self-pursuit.
The man who surrendered his whole life to the will of his Father.
The man who was treated unjustly, unfairly and unbelievably by so many.

But did Jesus ever stop pursuing, reaching and caring?

For I have come down from heaven, not to do My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me. Jo. 6:38

No, he knew who he served.

But, do we know?

Every moment is an opportunity to serve up love
and every pain point is an opportunity to reach beyond ourselves.

What holds us back? Feelings?

Truthfully, Jesus may have felt out of control, used or taken advantage of too.

Yet for Jesus, feelings, control and personal justice were never his greatest cause – love was.

And, it should be my greatest cause too.

Jesus laid down his crown of full control, so he could care for the Father’s greatest creation – us.

Love links arms and drops demands.
Love heals the broken and mends their aches.
Love reaches out when it’s not easy.

Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. Jo. 15:3

As I sat critiquing my friend, God spoke love over self, he whispered: “So what Kelly? Do you follow me? Kelly, go deeper on her behalf.”

I followed. With a gently rebuked and softened heart, and said, “Wow, you have been going through so much. I can only imagine how you feel.”

This sentence opened the floodgates to reveal deep pain, hurt and trials. She needed this moment. She craved this moment. It was a moment of healing ministry that God had set aside.

I am so glad I listened.

What if I had chosen apathy instead of empathy?
I would have missed this opportunity.

When we choose to follow Jesus, rather than our annoyances, all roads lead back to love.

It doesn’t matter if our mind protests, because Christ’s love can still work if we are just ready to drop our signs of injustice.

We simply set down our preconceived notions, we stop going through the motions and we watch him work.

We may lose all control, but it doesn’t matter because Jesus Christ has all control anyway. Following him is finding yourself under the control of the only one who really can control all things for good.

I want to reside there.

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Today, I am linking with #LiveFreeThursday, Five Minute Friday (I admit, spent more than 5-minutes. Sorry!) and #DanceWithJesus.

When God Doesn’t Give (Linkup)

May 12, 2015

purposefulfaith

blessings, Contentment, doubt, envy, God

109 Comments

A unique opportunity was given to me – and then completely taken away.

I could have brought so much to the table. I knew I would have done a great job. I knew God would have used me in a powerful way. I so badly wanted to be used. I so badly wanted to give all I had.

But, I wasn’t chosen. In a sense, I was left behind.

I just needed the chance. Why not me God?
I just needed someone to believe in me. God, can’t you clear a path for me?

Am I not good enough for your blessings? Not special enough to move your mighty hand?

Like a mother removing a treat from a child’s hands, God was pulled away what was mine. I threw a tantrum of my own and wallowed in hurt feelings and disappointment.

God had given, only to rip away.

The moment of his gift- lost.
The sweetness of the moment – handed to someone else.

Bad, bad, bad thoughts rushed in, like:

“One day they will see…they should have picked me.”
“I could have done this better. I would have been different, but more impactful.”
“I will do great things one day and they will say, ‘We made a mistake, we should have given her the chance.'”

God loves reaching curtained hearts,
the ones covered by pounds and pounds of fabric
that hide his show
– and cover his glow.

He opens our eyes. He pulls back the curtains. He places our eyes on him. The one who is center stage. The director of all, so we don’t miss it. So we don’t miss his truth.

So we see what is really at play.

And, what God said to my open, plaint and needy self was:

“(Kelly), are you saying,
‘I will ascend to the heavens;
I will raise my throne
above the stars of God;
I will sit enthroned on my mount…,
on the utmost heights…
I will ascend above the tops of the clouds;
I will make myself like the Most High?'”
Is. 14:12-14

Is that what you are saying, dear child? Because these words sound sadly familiar.

Words like:

“They will see my majesty.”
“They will see my glory.”
“They should have recognized me.”
“I will go so high.”
“I will one day show them.”

My heart was shocked. My eyes were open and his truth was flat out in front of me.

I was bowing down to the antithesis of truth.
To the great opposer of humility.
The enemy Father.

The enemy who says, God will leave you high and dry,
because he is up in the sky.

The enemy who points to your powerless as a weakness.

The enemy who shakes your feet to walk you straight away from the heart of Christ.

He is effective. Powerful. Cunning.

We are his best target, because if he can hit us, he can momentarily thwart the plans of God in our lives. He can run our heart amuck in fear, worry and worthlessness. How can one living here, truly honor God?

Yet, If I keep God’s truth front and center I realize:

He may not give me the good I want in today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.

This role may count for another’s soul.

My heart needs to learn a lesson in humility, so I can go to these places with stability.

When we are forced to step down, God steps up to teach our hearts deeper love.

God doesn’t want us reliant on opportunities, he want’s us reliant on him – the King.

He is forming us into a shadow-image of Christ, that should be our highest desire.

When it seems that God has taken away, the truth is – he has always given.

He has given us an opportunity to see his hand work in our heart. He has given us a chance to get on our knees. He has always given us a pliant heart.

He has given me a chance to be a foot warrior of contentment in the face of opposition and defeat. That is powerful.

He has shown me that the greatest victories aren’t in the big things we do for God, but in the small ways we endure, by faith, in defeat.

Now, my eyes are open to the workings of God.

Perhaps my greatest gift was found more in what I didn’t get, than what I did. For, what I didn’t get forged lessons and a heart condition that will last to eternity. What I could have gotten would have been done in a moment.

God is always giving us his best. Don’t let the devil fool you.

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (James 4:7)

ON ANOTHER NOTE – 2 Quick Updates/Announcements:

1. I am delighted to tell you that I am introducing a new regular contributor to the fold at Purposeful Faith. This woman has spoken so many times to my needy and controlled heart. Her words have been like a soothing oil on the rough parts of my striving. She is a #RaRalinkup Cheerleader already and certainly a woman I call friend. I know that so many of you already know and love her. Certainly, you will be blessed by her words to come on this site.

Let’s welcome Katie Reid as a regular Purposeful Faith contributor!
Join us this Thursday to support her big debut!

2. Compel members/future members – Join us tomorrow (Wednesday) on Twitter for the Compel Twitter party. Share a #CompelTip that you learned. On Thursday and Friday, linkup here.

Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

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Relying On The Spirit & Weekly Encouragement Video

May 11, 2015

purposefulfaith

Contentment, Freedom, God, grace, Holy Spirit

1 Comment

New! Weekly Encouragement Video.

Every Monday (because don’t we all just love Mondays?), I am going to be doing an encouraging word (2-short minutes!) via video. Hope you like them!

POST: Relying on the Spirit

Days pass.
The alarm clock goes off.
The bible happens.
The kids wake up.
Grace and lunch is served.
Play happens.
Grace, dinner and bed.

Sometimes, I can live my life in routine. I can go through the motions. I can live on auto-pilot.

But, did you know?
In a way, the kingdom has already come – in your own heart?
Can you grasp how transformational this is?

Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them. Jo. 14:23

We. Will. Come.

Who is we? Christ. The Spirit. One – living in us.

They don’t live in some corner of the attic, but they have moved straight into our living rooms. All the areas of our lives where we live – every corner and every crevice.

They have made their home in us.
They have settled in, taken over and we work their power out.
They’ve come to clean us up and to root love deep down.
They throw out the lies written on the walls of our heart, with the truth that is them.

Like blood, they are the sustenance that works through us. They keep pumping strength, courage and meaning.

This is why we are instructed to operate by the Spirit and not the flesh.

So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. Gal. 5:16

The Spirit:

– verifies light, love and the Word of God. Our flesh verifies feelings, shame and regret.
– prepares our way, in today, so that Christ is always at play.
– gets all things in order for the big day of Christ’s return.
– decorates our interior with the presence of God.
– confirms that one day we will walk into our eternal home complete in Christ Jesus.
– welcomes God in as our prized guest, he gets the best seat at our table called life.

Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? 1 Cor. 16:9

It is the works that pour out from the temple that will survive the fire.

Now if any man builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw, each man’s work will become evident; for the day will show it because it is to be revealed with fire, and the fire itself will test the quality of each man’s work. 1 Cor. 3:13

I want the fire of God to be lit in me, so that the fire of God will reveal quality in my life.

Lord, let me understand the power of the Spirit that you have placed within me. Rightfully place my eyes on the power of Christ. Let me go knowing the extreme presence that you have imparted in my innermost being. Let me not live in routine, but solely by the power of your Spirit at work in me. Give me eyes to see and to walk with you.

Understanding Heals

May 8, 2015

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, fear, forgiveness, Freedom, grace

22 Comments

He didn’t want to get out and all I wanted to do was climb back in, cover my head and ponder how one can be so completely incapable of handling a bad situation.

But, instead of retreating into myself, I grabbed his legs and pulled. I pulled with all my might and – like a rubber band – his body extended in and out of the car – over and over again. This cat-and-mouse game seemed to be the workout that would never end. It continued to the point where his pants were nearly coming off.

Annoyance melted away and in its place was a big smile and a spirit of fun.

Sometimes, when life gives you the worst, you just gotta return it back your best.
Sometimes, when things get hard, changing your approach changes your feelings.
Sometimes, when you don’t know what to do, you don’t have to.

You just do what will keep your head on, your heart in and love pouring out.

I was kind of proud of myself in this moment for not letting that 3-year old defeat me. Yet, as I turned around one stood ready to bring me back to that place of defeat.

I met man. He stood staring, eyes laser focused right on me. Right on my antics. Uh-oh.

I realized, he had been waiting right. next. to. me. Waiting for what must have been a very long time. I was blocking his door.

All I could muster was “Oh, I am so sorry. Have you been here long?”

He answered, “You know, I have been where you are. Just know, I completely understand.”

Meeting his words was like meeting a doctor filled with compassion.
His understanding quenched my thirst for acceptance.
His tone let me know that I was not alone.

The simple words “I understand” changed the game.

And, this really gets me to thinking. So many times, we think we are alone, we think we can’t walk, we think we need to retreat in our cars, we think we are the only person screaming out amidst thousands. We think we can’t handle things.

We think no one gets our situation.

But one does. One always understands.
One looks and says, “You know, I have been there. I understand.”

When life breaks down, this one says, “I understand.”
When feelings pound over you like a boxer in a ring, he says, “I understand.”
When you have to go somewhere you don’t want to go, he says, “I understand.”
When people don’t do what you want them to do, he says, “I understand.”
When (fill in the blank), he says, “I understand.”

This one is Jesus.

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are–yet he did not sin. Heb. 4:15

As we see that God understands, he:

changes our hurting hearts to hopeful ones.
no longer seems far away, but near in today.
confirms to your spirit that if he got through, you can too.
doesn’t appear to point at your inadequacy, but he simply points out love.

In every case, at all times Jesus understands. He is well acquainted with pain and suffering. He doesn’t look to beat you down, but he understands to build you up. He doesn’t look to condemn, but to conform your heart to his as he configures your emotions to his truth.

Freedom and grace are packaged in the understanding
that God understands.

Freedom and grace are packaged though people who show others they understand.

For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sake he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich. 2 Cor. 8:9

-Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

Linking with #LiveFreeThursday, #DancewithJesus and Five Minute Friday.

Find God’s Grace in the Midst of Disgrace

May 6, 2015

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, fear, grace, guilt

11 Comments

Ever felt like you were so close to God, only to somehow fall off-course?
To somehow lose your in-step walk with the one who gives all peace, joy and love?

It’s easy to wonder how you got to this place. How you somehow diverted your path from his.

These thoughts plague me. I wonder, how can I avoid this next time, because
a judgement,
a critique,
a frustration,
an irritation,
an aggravation,
anger,
jealousy,
a circumstance,
a catastrophe,
my selfishness,
so often land me in a land miles away from my greatest love.

Like lost child, I lose my maker. It’s not that I don’t want to be with him, but something pulls me off-course: another grabs my attention, an emotion makes me run the other way or a circumstance takes hold. Before I know it, there I stand there – a missing child in a massive world trying to make my way back to my maker.

My once in-step, turned-in, reliant heart on Christ
becomes an out-of-step, out-of-focus, reliant heart on my problems.

I can see what’s around me, but I can’t see him.
I can see people, problems and the past, but I have blocked out his light.
I can see my feelings light as day, but I still feel buried deep in a distant hole.
Unchecked emotions have covered my heart.

And, one thing I am sure of is this: one covered with the unchecked emotions of shame, guilt and regret, can’t be shining the light of Christ’s resurrection, power and love.

One loaded under the weight of unrepented issues, can’t be radiating love and light through the earth.

So, I wonder, which do I have –
a heart covered by the weight of guilt
or a heart uncovered by the flashlight of Christ’s grace?

What God uncovers he uses for his glory. And what is hidden – is just that – hidden.

Hidden things stay covered.
Stay distanced.
Stay embarrassed.

Yet, God calls us “the salt of the earth.” Mt. 5:13

How can people taste salt if they can’t see it?

Instead of being salt-hiders,
we have another option, we can be salt-makers with God.

Do you see it?

Salt is produced by enduring pain, hardships and trials with Christ. As we move into deep intimacy with God, we move into knowledge of how to season other’s hearts. We start to flavor the world with the great testimony of his revealed power in our lives.

Salt is a God’s cleansing agent, and we are it’s salespeople. Let’s represent his holiness well.

“For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.” 2 Corinthians 4:6

Let’s shine bright to display his light!

We have a light that cannot be contained.

A city set on a hill.
It goes far and wide.
As a beacon of love.
That no one can miss.
That makes opponents flee.
That keeps your heart in safe places.
That endures until we come into his glorious light.

Don’t forget: You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.” Matthew 5:14

It’s a beacon of love, a calling to all to come and know him.

Shine! Don’t remove your hand from his, don’t be pulled away from your Father, don’t get lost in the masses, don’t fall down in a pit, just keep revealing your heart to the light-shiner to let your life be transformed with the power of his always-exposed love.

He will never let you down, he will always chase after you the second you are lost. He loves you so much. He has chose you as his own. He is ready to shine so much goodness out of you, if only you will run your problems straight to his great flashlight of grace.

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More Than Enough

May 1, 2015

purposefulfaith

blessings, Contentment, faith, fear

11 Comments

Do you remember when you bought your first home?
Probably, no matter the price, you put a large bulk of your saved money into the down payment.

That’s how it worked for us.

With no extra money to buy furniture, I felt like it wasn’t just the echoes of empty rooms that were resounded in my heart, but the echoes of not having enough.

I can’t have people over, when the first thing they see is that room!
I can’t even enjoy this house, until we can actually sit down!
No one is walking through that front door, until things change around here!

But, God – he had different plans. His different plans, are always the best plans, for my not-so-well-laid plans.

He had plans to take my “not enough” and exchange it for “more than good enough.” He always seems to do that when we are looking, seeking and praying after his will, doesn’t he?

You see, the word “insufficient” doesn’t reside in Jesus’ vocabulary,

because he entirely defines the word sufficient.

If we have Jesus, we have the all-encompassing sufficient answer to every one of life’s problems. It can just be very hard to see in the whirlwind of pain. He understands this and, in many cases, gently brings us right into his fold, when we are ready.

In my case, he exchanged my empty room and empty heart for something far greater,
way more hectic and a billion times more exciting.

My empty room, covered with the wallpaper of “not enough”, became “more than enough” as the paper busted at the seams, exposing joy, peace and glory. We found our nightly ritual – a family worship session on the best dance floor in town – our living room.

We went in that room to dance and sing with all our hearts. We had more than enough!
We ran around with smiles wide and kids raised up. We had more than enough!
We saw our toddlers joy as they ran circles around us. We had more than enough!
We opened our hearts and eyes to see our great high and lifted God. We had more than enough!

When we look for Jesus, no matter our situation –
whether a small one like mine or a bigger one like death –
we find him.

He is the door to our “more.”
He is the access to our joy.
He is the way to life.
He is the answer of peace.
He is the hope in all.

In my situation, I had much to be thankful for, but still, I was not content. I saw the door that I didn’t want visitors to enter, but what I didn’t realize was that my focus was on the wrong door.

I should have been looking at Jesus as the door.

I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture. (John 10:9)

Jesus is always the access point to greater things.

If you have walked through Jesus’ door of salvation, you are saved.
Not just saved for eternity’s joys, but saved to enjoy Christ’s present ones in today.
Are you seeking them?

If you have walked through Jesus’ door, you are gaining access to your calling and mission.
Are you using your gifts, talents and finances for his glory?

If you walk through Jesus’ door, you will find pasture.
Your Father wants to bring you much joy, peace and purpose in life.
Are you relying on him?

If we have chosen to walk through his door, Christ has presented us with eternal riches, his present day glory, focused missions, fulfilling callings, joy-filled songs, enduring character and his ever-present help in a time of trouble.

We no longer live in empty rooms of despair, discouragement and doubt, but our rooms become filled with the love and presence of Jesus Christ.

When we look for him, we realize we have – and always had – more than enough!

Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” (Heb. 13:5)

Now there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world. But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. (1 Tim. 6:6-8)

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Cor. 12:9)

Our great shepherd is leading us into his great, powerful and calm-of-heart pastures.
Will we follow him?

We already have “more than enough.”

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Today I am delighted to join #LiveFreeThursday, Five Minute Friday and #DanceWithJesus.

Smile Again: When Someone Hurts You (Linkup)

April 28, 2015

purposefulfaith

Contentment, failure, faith, fear, forgiveness, Freedom

65 Comments

I got in a tiff.

This came as a surprise to me. I certainly didn’t mean to go there – to the place where my voice got a little louder and my eyes watered a little greater – only to end pouring out in an avalanche of tears.

Ever been there?
To that place where you hate going?
The one where you regret visiting after all is said and done?

I don’t like that place. It distracts my heart from the day’s duties, it disrupts my sleep and it usually leaves me guilt-ridden for days.

Yet, there I was – feelings busted open. Wide open. Lying on the floor open.

It felt, this person was crippling my authentic heart towards God.

Negating my pure intentions.
Saying I was inadequate.
As if, she was not for me.

I took insult.

And, while forgiveness seemed further than Antarctica yesterday, isn’t it amazing how the gift of time can move our hearts rapidly into God’s light? His light where he brings all truth.

His light exposed my aching and rapidly pulsing heart. Here, I was able to identify a resounding theme – She made me feel ____________ about _____________.

If God is God – and, I am not…

If God is God – and they are not…

How can another define who I am?

How could they ever define the intentions of my heart?

They can’t. Only God defines me. Only He knows the inner workings of Kelly. Only He knows the deep intentions and the pulse of my life, which no one else is privy to.

So, why did I absorb all her words as if they were greater than His?

Why did I overreact instead of act with love?

When you hold someone accountable for that which Christ has already given you, you wrongly exalt them above your Maker.

Sure, words, instruction and wisdom are vital to a strong Christian walk. We should receive these things. And, indeed, the body of Christ is surely put in place to build up, but one thing is true – people never hold greater authority than the work of God or the Word of God.

God never gave people make or break status. They don’t have that ability – unless we let them.

Our job is to keep our eyes constantly set on him above, so we can always walk in love.

So doubt doesn’t set in.
So fear doesn’t win.
So, others don’t steal our grin.

Then, God enters in.

For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. (Mt. 7:2)

When I think of this friend, I realize I can’t hold her accountable. Likely, she didn’t know how badly I strive to be pure, she didn’t know how much I pray to be used, she didn’t know how much power her words held. She likely didn’t know her words would cripple. How could she?

Her only responsibility is her own heart, before her great God – something I am entirely not responsible for.

But, I am responsible to respond to God. To forgive. To see past. To release. To love. To heal. To build into. To encourage. To see past. To bear under.

God calls me here because forgiveness is often about them, just as much as it is about me.

We don’t have to approve what happened,
we just have to approve that God is best equipped to handle it.

We don’t have to feel healed,
we just have to trust he will heal us.

We don’t have to fight,
but simply let God fight on our behalf. (Ex. 14:14)

We don’t have to dwell in misery-mode,
God is calling us to ministry-mode.

This is the call of God. The calling of our heart. The calling to lay down arms, in order to pick up an arm to love, to hug and to wrap around the one before us.

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” (1 Sam. 16:7)

God sees hearts. Only God.

As we seek God, he reveals our hearts to us. You know what I see when I look deep, deep into my heart? The heart that fought so hard to be right before God? Embarrassingly, I see that nasty word, that mean word, that ugly word – the one we never want to admit or see – PRIDE.

How many of our arguments are based from this place?

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)

Forgive me Father. I have sought to look good before man. I have sought to win approval from a sister in Christ. Yet, all that matters is your view of me. You know me and you see me. Forgive me for my anger at not being seen by her, because all that matters is – YOU. Amen.

The Lord changes hearts, with these types of prayer. He replaced my pulsating hot heart with a radiating softened heart of love. When someone hurts you, God will use it as an opportunity to rework you – if only you let him.

Receive one another, then, just as Christ also received you, to God’s glory. Ro. 15:7

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Remember God’s Faithfulness

April 16, 2015

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, trials

5 Comments

Post by Katy

The word tumor took my breath away.

Even through two months of watching the little bump on Elijah’s head grow, that word never once invaded my thoughts. But there I stood, with my 5-month old son and a doctor looking at me with those words, It’s a tumor. We’ll have to remove it.

Why do words you never want to hear stick with you for a lifetime?

Two weeks later I handed my son over to the nurse with one last kiss. One last prayer. One last, I love you. Luke and I walked hand in hand down the hall. I stared at the floor choking back tears. Be strong, I whispered in my head. Tears won’t help now.

Those two weeks between the diagnosis and surgery gave us plenty of time to think, to wonder, to ask … Why does he have to go through this? Did we do something wrong?

We prayed like we’ve never prayed before. We begged. We pleaded. Please God heal him. Please God let this be benign. Please protect him. Bring him through this.

Luke and I sat shoulder to shoulder on the couch, every few minutes asking each other, “You okay?” We felt helpless. We begged God for mercy.

Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will mount up with wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31 (NIV)

Doctors expected a 4-hour surgery, so when they met us in the waiting room just 2 1/2 hours later it caught us by surprise. Benign. He said the word, benign. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry or scream Hallelujah! My son’s going to be okay!!!

Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Jesus.

God filled the days following surgery with grace like only He provides. This happy boy never needed pain medicine. He recovered like a champ, and fittingly his name means “spiritual champion.”

I tell you this story because that baby turns 8-years old this month.

And I believe in the power of remembering God’s blessings.

… Let it remind you always to recite this teaching of the Lord: ‘With a strong hand, the Lord rescued you from Egypt.'” Exodus 13:9 (NLT)

When God freed the Israelites from Egypt He told them to celebrate their escape every year. God called the annual festival a “visible sign … like a mark branded” on their hands or foreheads.

The same God who led the Israelites out of Egypt called us out of darkness and into His marvelous light.

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9 (NIV)

Has God freed you or rescued you from something? Answered a prayer? Heard a cry of your heart? Declare His praises!

Today, take a minute and remember. Remember God’s past faithfulness.

It may be something as simple as God giving you a happy baby when all the other kids need baths and you’re running solo. Celebrate it!

Or maybe a tank of gas lasted miles and miles longer than it ever should have. Celebrate it!

Maybe you asked for a last-minute baby sitter and God provided. Celebrate it!

Maybe you’re whole world fell apart and God pieced (or is just starting to piece) it back together with His gentle, patience hand. Celebrate it!

The further we travel from the moment God’s strong hand so intimately connects to our little lives, the easier it becomes to grumble. Complain. Doubt. (See the book of Exodus!)

Choose to remember God’s faithfulness. And let God’s past faithfulness lead you to a future built on His promises.

Will you share something you’re celebrating today? Leave a Comment!

Sincerely,

Katy

I left my job as a television news reporter to join my husband, Luke, on our adventure in the National Football League. 10 years, 12 moves, 6 kids, 5 teams, and 4 states later, it’s safe to say the road has been anything but predictable. Our dreams today don’t look quite like they did ten years ago, but I’ve learned along the way dreams do come true … even if you’re not a Disney World. I blog about a football wife’s life at www.katymccown.com and I’d love for you to visit me!

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