Purposeful Faith

Tag - hope

Dealing with Super Annoying People

October 7, 2016
purposefulfaith
Contentment, doubt, failure, faith, fear
2 Comments
Annoying Friends

Some people live like sandpaper under the skin. Ever noticed? They keep on rubbing and rubbing against you until your inflamed and sore. Usually, I try to smile and keep  good cheer, but of late, I’ve secretly wanted to knock these people down. I’ve wanted to peg ’em like little clown heads at a carnival. Boom! The ball bangs ’em and their taunting faces fall.

“Bahaha!” I’d laugh with an evil, cackling tone. “I’ll knock you all down…”

First I’d hit clown #1: This high-flying lady is consumed with sharing all her bragadocious mommy wins. All. The. Time. She tosses them out like Louis Vuitton bags, like showy diamonds or personal victories of her amazingness. My kid? He is reading already. My strategy? They go straight down to bed. My success? All my friends are asking me how I do it. (I bet they are, lady!)

I’m convinced, she wants me to:

  1. Worship at her feet.
  2. Wildy applause her grand strategies.
  3. Hail her as reigning queen.
    I just want to peg her.

Then I’d hit clown #2: The I-am-right-all-the-time and can do no wrong person.

This person speaks and is 100% right. There’s no changing views. No talking about other options. No going a different path. This person speaks, you best listen.

There’s nothing else to say. He’s like a splinter, digging deeper every time he talks.

What would happen if I hurt him as much as he hurt me?

Clown #3: This girl she is your best friend until someone better comes along, then she trashes you like old milk. You feel sour. Apparently, she’s far more concerned about looking good, getting in with the right people and moving to a different social stratosphere. Underneath your I’m-as-cool-as-a-cucumber persona, you want to sling cuss words, but you’re Christian, so you don’t. Instead, you think, “She is selfish and self-seeking. Hmph!”

You think about pegging her too.

What person is an irritant, so abrasive,
you want to push them down?

Is this person pushing Jesus right out of you?

Well, perhaps, the trick’s on us!!!  All along, we thought they were the clowns, the ones hiding behind a facade, but what if it was actually us? Let’s take a look:

Let’s consider, Clown #1:

My makeup-face: If I admit it, I am a bit jealous of this super-momma. I also may not act exactly the same as her, but I long to be seen.

Her truth: She likely feels insecure and unsure about what she is doing. She likely needs the praise of fellow-woman to feel good about herself. Or, she needs constant fuel to keep sustaining herself. She needs a good word to keep going. I can relate to that a little.

Clown #2:

My makeup-face: I am not patient. I want to be acknowledged, valued and loved (kind of reminds me of clown #1). I want to be heard.

His truth: He is excited to share. He wants to be valued. He wants to be seen as wise. He is looking to connect not hurt me.

Clown #3:

My make-up face: Sometimes I hope people will help me.

Her truth: She’s been abandoned by people in her past and is looking to be accepted today. Her heart needs love, unconditional love.

What I use to knock others down,
really only knocks me down.

What I hate in others, usually is found
somewhere in the trenches – of me.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye
and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? Mt. 7:3

3 Clowns. 3 Irritants. 3 Shadows of Myself.
3 people I run from.

Why?

Because I hate their little blown-up balloons of whatever – comparison, pride, people pleasing. It feels good to blame them for bad form, rather than seeing my own form pop and burst before me. Yet, when I really look, really consider, I am just as flawed, just as broken, just as needy – and I can’t shape a darn elephant or a dog if my life depended on it.

Humility.

Aren’t we all just trying to get past the past? Aren’t we all just trying to fill the gaps of pain that existed? Aren’t we all in need of love, a helping hand and a person who understands that we aren’t perfect – but, still, stays with us?

In so many ways, when I love them, I am loving me.
In so many ways, when I show kindness to them, I am welcoming Jesus’ kindness to my own heart.
In so many ways, when I give them grace, I am learning what grace really is.

5 Ways to Build up People, Instead of Knocking them Over (GRACE):

Get to the heart of the matter. Ask, “How is their heart feeling?”
Respect the idea that our hard roads give us all hard edges.
Accept that you can’t change them, but you can change how you react to them.
Come to the Lord. Ask him for how to best approach them with love.
Evaluate your own heart to see where your sin might reside.

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When Prayer Goes Unanswered

October 5, 2016
purposefulfaith
Contentment, doubt, fear, prayer
1 Comment
prayer goes unanswered

I stared out the window.  My eyes squinted, not because the sun was blinding me, but because I was furious with God.

Absolutely. Stinkin’. Furious.

He failed me. And from where I stood in that moment, on those knees that were bended in prayer for the past six months – my view wasn’t pretty. I pleaded and postured and trusted to no end – and I saw nothing for it. I believed God was going to come through for me – and now I am left looking at a pile of nothingness. Even worse, I am looking at damages.

God not only didn’t come through, he hurt me.

So, like any good Christian girl, I went to church. And when they sung, “How great is our God,” I lip-synced. When they asked us to pray, I kept my insides empty. And when my husband asked what stood out in the pastor’s message, I grunted, “Mmm…hmmm….”

Do you feel that God abandoned you?

Maybe someone is still sick. The spouse is still mean. The dog is still lost. Your heart is even more lost. A child still won’t return. Your finances are in the dumps. A friend has gone and hurt you. Your past is not healed. You live in a place that is horrible. Your car won’t stop breaking down. Your face is getting old. Your kids are getting obnoxious. Your life looks ugly.

Whatever is going wrong, it’s because God is gone rogue.
Whatever is broken is because Mr. Fixer Upper didn’t do his job right.
Whatever makes us feel uncomfortable is because the God of comfort lost his magic.

Oh, I know these feelings alright. To say they’ve never existed is probably to lie.

But, years later, upon reflection of this bitter hour, I see things through a different prism, a different angle. Whoever said time heals, knows its true. And it is. Looking back, I see both Him and me through time and things played out. Sense arrives.

I’ve observed:

1. Sometimes you don’t get the lesser prayer because God is answering a bigger prayer.
Let me tell you about my son. He was a screamer on steroids. He’d wail so hard a lung would nearly pop out.  I’d pace. I’d try to keep him together. I’d try to keep me together. It was a song and dance, an anxious time. God didn’t answer my prayer that he sleep. But, you know what? In retrospect, it was an anointed time. It kept my husband up, and me too, so we could pray my numb legs and hands were not an actual diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis. You know what? God answered that prayer.

2. Seasons come, but seasons also pass. 
Back to the 10-pound screamer…he screamed, but six months later, he stopped screaming. I no longer had to endlessly bounce, with a broken back and arms that felt as if they might fall off. He, miraculously, like an angel, fell asleep on his own. Not only that, he made it through the night! What is hard today, may often becomes joy the next morning.

3. Waiting produces patience.  What we often fail to realize is that patience = faith. We pray, “God make me more faithful.” This is usually the equivalent of praying, “God make me a better waiter.” It is in the wait that we learn faith. It is here where iron meets the road and we either stick it through with God – or we bail.

4. God’s sole job is not to keep me happy. There is no law that says God must keep me happy. He often does, because he loves me. But, also, because he loves me, he teaches me. Just as I allow my son to learn from his mistakes, often God lets us live out ours, so we can return closer to him.

5. What looks like rejection is often protection. We see life horizontally. God sees life horizontally, vertically, cross-diagonally and inside out, he sees it up and down and all around. He sees how person A affects person B and how person B may know Jesus if person A goes here or there. He also sees how shutting a door may prevent our foot from getting jammed in it.

God hasn’t given up on the disgrace that is you. He doesn’t have better or more important people to deal with. He doesn’t discount your prayer as stupid, frivilous or worthless. He doesn’t see you as needy. He loves your need. He loves your longing. He loves you voice that calls out for his name.

Even more, God has a plan. It isn’t a plan that looks like your days activity. It looks like a matrix, a flow-chart and a high-level war plan for greatness that is being worked out on spiritual, eternal and visible levels. You can’t understand it. But, you’re not meant to.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.

Surely, as I have planned, so it will be and as I have purposed, so it will happen. Is. 14:24

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Don’t Get Lost

October 3, 2016
purposefulfaith
blessings, Contentment, failure, faith
1 Comment

I am delighted to welcome Donna Sisler to Women’s Ministry Monday. Her words speak directly to my heart today!

I’m not sure why, but years ago I started saying “don’t get lost” as my loved ones walked out the door. After the usual goodbye sayings—you know, “have a good day,” “I love you,” etc.—the last words to my kids were “don’t get lost.”

If they were going somewhere with the possibility of them getting lost, it made sense. But then, at other times, it really didn’t make sense, like when they were heading to bed.

My kids have heard this phrase throughout their lives and they aren’t surprised when they hear it. However, my husband of fifteen years hasn’t quite figured it out. Why would I say “don’t get lost” when he’s heading to the local grocery store or off to work? He goes to these places quite frequently and he knows the way to all of them.

I would like to say that I began using this phrase to remind my kids and family of what was expected of them. Of what our family valued. Of who they were in Jesus. But to be honest, I don’t recall determining one day to say “don’t get lost” for these purposes. In the beginning, it was a way to make my kids smile as they walked out the door.

However, through the years, “don’t get lost” began to take on these deeper meanings. They became words that my children expected to hear and I would hope have grown to cherish as adults.

“Don’t get lost” was and still is Jesus’ message. We are so easily distracted in our spiritual lives. When we find ourselves in these situations, Jesus is there to remind us not to get lost. He reminds us how to get back on track. By following His way, listening to His truth and being filled with His abundant life.

In John 13, Jesus’ disciples seemed to be losing their way. They wanted to follow Jesus to the death, but Jesus knew they would get lost. Jesus offered words of encouragement to His beloved group of followers in the beginning of John 14 and then Thomas asked this question that perhaps you’ve expressed.

“Lord, we don’t know where you are going,
so how can we know the way?” (John 14:5 – NIV)

Have you been so lost that you didn’t know how to get “unlost?”

I know I have. And even when I knew the way, when I knew how to get myself “unlost,” I just wasn’t sure that I would be able to find my way or that I would be accepted once I returned.

It’s during these moments when Jesus’ words from John 14:6 (NIV) are exactly what we need to hear. “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Jesus is the way to get “unlost.” He is the way to the Father. He is the way to truth and life. Jesus is the Way.

I heard a long time ago that if you’re ever lost it’s best to stay put and let rescuers come to you. It’s the same with Jesus. If you’re lost and know you can’t do any more on your own, stop. Wait for Jesus to come and rescue you. Walk alongside Him in His truth. Jesus will help you get “unlost.”

Let’s make today a great day for Jesus and remember, don’t get lost!

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About Donna Sisler

screen-shot-2016-09-27-at-11-59-43-amDonna Sisler is a devoted wife, mother and grandmother. She lives in the beautiful state of Colorado where she finds great inspiration for her novels and devotional writings.

Donna is passionate about helping women find their way to Jesus through Bible study, teaching, speaking, inspirational writing and creative Bible journaling.

Donna is the Niwot Women’s Ministry Director at Rocky Mountain Christian Church, where their mission is to equip, inspire and empower women in their pursuit of Jesus.

Want to read more from Donna? You can follow her through her blog atwww.fullmeasureofjoy.com.

Love In Training

September 30, 2016
Christy Mobley
blessings, Contentment, failure, faith, fear, hope
Love In Training

By: Christy Mobley

Today while driving home from a meeting I had a revelation. I’m living on the training grounds for love.

You’ve heard what praying for patience gets you, well I want to explain where praying to love takes you. However, before I got to this place of truth I first had to pass through a few painful phases…

Maybe you’ll be able to relate.

I know it’s hard to believe but not everyone loves/likes me. I’m pretty sure I know a few people who don’t (and some of them may be relations)!

There was a time not so many years ago, if someone said something to me off-putting, unkind or otherwise just plain mean, I would pick up the phone and call my mom or one or two, okay maybe three of my “true” friends (who would side with me) and I’d dice, slice and dissect the cruel words ten different ways until I was worn slap out and tearless. I suppose this kind of talk could be interpreted as gossiping… about myself. And it never truly made me feel better.

This was my phase one.

Finally after exhausting my friends and when I couldn’t solve the mystery of the perpe-“traitor’s” meanness, I might take it to God and dump on Him asking Him to make certain necessary changes in said mean person.

This was my phase two.

Phase three went something like this…

As I grew in my relationship with the Lord, talking to Him (praying) and listening, I started recognizing how He was working in my life. I came to trust Him, really trust Him. That’s when I started taking my hurts to Him first—a big move for me. When I’d be tempted to pick up the phone I’d feel the Spirit nudge me to stop.

I finally did.

This graduated me to the phase three.

As I started aspiring to be more like Jesus, my desire grew to be obedient to His Word in every way, which meant I needed to love like He loves.

A tall order.

I began to pray a specific prayer for each difficult person I came across. A prayer I still pray today and It goes something like this.

Dear Lord, help me to see ______ the way you see them so that I may love them the way you love them.

This phase lasted many years. I thought I was making real progress but I had to go a step further. I needed to recognize my part in the equation. And God waited until I was ready to hear it.

Phase 4…

I came to a place where I would pray to see the hard people the way God saw them and pray to love them the way God loved them but I didn’t want to have to deal with them.

My thoughts would be, away with you hurtful person. I want nothing to do with you. I can pray for you and love you from afar but you can’t hurt me if you can’t get close.

It was after a painful rejection, while I was having this conversation in my head, I heard God say, what makes you any different from them? Do you not treat me at times the same way they treat you?

It was honest, it was convicting and in God’s infinite wisdom, the right time for me to hear and accept this truth.

And the Truth changed my perspective and brought me the next phase and the training ground for love.
Here my eyes can see, these hard people in my life are not part of the problem, they actually provide the solution.

They are the training grounds for love.

“But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise.”1 Corinthians 1:7

It’s easy is to love those who love us, share with us, give to us? On the other hand, it feels almost contrary to reason, foolish even, to love those who snub us, hate us, ridicule us, whose mouths drip with sarcasm aimed at us.

And yes, if I keep my eyes focused upward on Jesus, I can see these hard people the way He sees them; the way He sees me—a hurting soul in a broken world.

Today I can say it’s an honor to come to this place. The battle ground where I lay my life down for a better one. On the training grounds for love.

What ground are you standing on right now?

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Purposeful Faith Contributor

Christy is a girly girl who chases tennis balls for recreation and at the end of the day does her best thinking in the tub.

She’s also a wife, mother, mother-in-law, soon to be grandma, speaker and mentor. Her passion is to encourage women to move forward, and press on while seeking God’s presence in every bump and turn in the road.

You can find Christy at Joying in the Journey,  christymobley.com, Twitter, and Facebook

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When You Long to Do Something Bad

September 22, 2016
purposefulfaith
attack, Contentment, doubt, failure, mercy
1 Comment
Beauty In Imperfection

I was in the store. I looked left and I looked right. I winked at my co-conspirator. I knew what I was going to do was wrong. Real wrong. But, I wanted to follow through. I wanted the thrill, the goods and the joy of her knowing I could do this. I grabbed the shirt and ducked in the dressing room.

Guilt followed me.

Is there something you’re doing behind the curtain?

Is there something you know you shouldn’t do,
but feel inclined to do anyway?

What is done in secret is still seen by God.

Ouch! That hurts right?  The reality is, we don’t want to stop. We want to keep going because the idea of approaching it the right way feels too difficult, emotional or vulnerable. It is hard to stop what you already have going, what you’ve already invested in. Stopping sin, sometimes feels like stopping a freight train going 100 miles an hour with your bare hand.

Just this morning, I wanted to approach something the easy way. There was a clear-cut solution to a difficult problem. I saw a direct path; it was wrong. I convinced myself it wasn’t really wrong. I counted up the ways, it could be right. I negotiated with my holy side – God can make a little allowance for this one.

God didn’t agree. He gave no peace.

“Just this once, God?”

When I try to grant permission to the wrong way,
I miss seeing God’s way –
 finding the reward at the end of the path called, “faith.”

“And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.” Heb. 11:6

Faith is believing in God so much, you do the right thing. It is deciding it is hard, but determining he will take care of you. It is believing that even without the thrill, he’ll thrill your heart. It is believing, even if you have to do it the long way, he’ll give shortcuts. It is believing, pain in the making is all about the new God is creating.

You can go the right way because God’s way always treats you right.

Provider will provide.
Lover will love.
Helper will help.
Guider will guide.
Creator will create opportunities.
Healer will heal.

When you open yourself up to God’s will pushing from behind you,
his new life-giving way opens up before you.

Will you believe by faith so you don’t walk fretting bad decisions?

Certainly, the result of one who walks by faith is being near to God. But, the lengths of God’s blessings don’t stop there, friends, he goes beyond this. He says he “rewards” the person who seeks him.

When you walk in obedience, by faith, he rewards in abundance – that very faith.

Imagine that?!  What you want, will be greater, if by faith, you let him give it to you.

Fear not.
Strive not.
Lust not.
Drink not.
Compare not.
Want not.
Steal not.
Lie not.
Worry not.

God has the best gift waiting for you.

“Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean…”  (Heb 10:22)

Let nothing come between you and the giver and sustainer of life. He has what you need. He is what you need. So,drop all that holds you back and walk towards him, unhindered, into all that he is ready to give you.

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Related Reading:

Sometimes, Failing Precedes Blessings

How to Really Fight Back using the Sword of the Spirit

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When You’re Self-Critical and Feel Unhealable

September 21, 2016
purposefulfaith
approval, Contentment, doubt, failure, fear
1 Comment
Self-Critical

Do you hate yourself when you yell – again?
Do you want to flick your wrist when you eat those brownies you should’ve dumped a week ago?
Do you call yourself an idiot for forgetting that appointment?
Do you believe you’ll never get better, live better or act better?

Freedom can feel far.
Hope can feel lost.
Deliverance can taste like an extra-large pizza,
when you are one who berates yourself in your head.

Half my life, I’ve looked at my mistakes and asked, “Kelly, why are you so stupid?”
I say something dumb. “Kelly, why are you so stupid?”
I bump someone’s bumper with my bumper, “Kelly, why are you so stupid?”
I miss an opportunity, “Kelly, why are you so stupid?”

No wonder, one of my big fears is of being stupid. I’ve been speaking that fear into my heart for a long, long time.

What have you been speaking into your heart? Does it look – and hit – hard, like a hammer to the head or does it look and feel soft – like grace?

If you’re a heavy self-hitter, like me, listen up, because this is important: You no longer have to be hard on yourself, because the world was already hard on Jesus.

Let it really sink in. It hit him hard – and he took it.

Have you considered the weight of that? You don’t have to beat yourself up because, Jesus, the bodyguard of all bodyguards, took all your hits. He got hit so hard his flesh broke wide open.

So, while you sit and stare at your injuries, thinking, “They’ll never heal,” God says, “If I conquered the cross, surely I can conquer what plagues your heart today.”

Your brokenness is of no magnitude
that the maker of heaven and earth can’t fix it.

When you whisper, “Please God, help me, help me, help me. God, I can’t. God…God…God…”

God hears and nearly whispers, “Jesus”.

Because if you see this man on the cross,
if you see the fullness of his gift,
if you see the King,
nearly riding to death on a donkey,
in this place of poverty and powerlessness,
if you just see him,
you’ll see how he hung –
arms wide open,
for you,
the weak, wounded and restless one.

You’ll see mercy,
care
and foreknowledge,
pour out.

You’ll see his heart
to save –
both for today and yesterday.

When we see, Jesus, the man who won our freedom,
we really begin to trust his life can  save us.

He didn’t died for us yesterday,
only to give a half-hoot about us today.

When Jesus spread his arms on the cross, he welcomed our pain. He welcomed the addicts, the rapists, the depressives, the adulterers, the anxiety-prone, the controllers, the abusers, the abused and the proud. He basically says, “See me, I am reaching out to hug you, to embrace you – to receive the worst of you. Don’t forget what I’ve done. Let yourself be saved from your plague.“

With this idea friends, knowing his heart, I want to be saved afresh. There is an area so wounded in me, I keep on trying to layer dirt over it. I keep trying to wrestle it down in my own mind. I keep wanting to tell it to go hide out in Timbuktu. It never does. It tapes itself to me. It labels me.

Well, today friends, today…today, I say, Jesus, you are my only way. I am willing to travel through the hurt to find your help. I am willing to get honest with you, so I can get healed by you. I am willing to give it a shot, knowing that you surpass my slip ups.

“Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God.” (1 Pet. 2:16)

Hurt one, are you ready to live free? What’s holding you back?

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Ps. 147:3

Related Reading:

10 Reasons to Stop Being Hard on Yourself

When Forgiving Yourself is Hard (Linkup)

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How to Be Unshakable in the Face of Turbulence

September 20, 2016
purposefulfaith
approval, Comparing, Contentment, doubt, fear
13 Comments
be unshakeable

What are you going after?

This is a question you do not ignore. Instead, it is one you put a pretty design around and then get tattooed on your hand.

It is that important.

You wear this question as if it is a badge of your dedication. You return to it often.

During my days in corporate America, I tried really hard. In my mind, I did really good. I responded to emails with lightning speed. I came up with proactive ideas before my boss even voiced word of the problem. I arrived not just with plans but complete SWOT analyses of the whole situation. I was always a step ahead.

After a long day at work, I’d run to release some steam. I’d run and think “I wonder if my boss sees all I am doing? I wonder if his boss sees too?”  I assured myself, “Kelly, you’ll go places. They’ll uncover you and say, ‘Wow, what a gem.'”

Between striving and running. I was exhausted.

I was going after the wrong thing: the desire to be the star.

I wouldn’t have admitted this, but:
People were often a casualty in my race.
Problems were my ticket to a Kelly-solved-it phone call up the chain.
Work was a means to my end.
I didn’t feel good unless I looked good.

A woman dedicated to self-exalting ways
will run with skinned knees and deep discontentment.

What is your end? Not the one you try to convince yourself that you’re after, but the one daily you live for by your actions? The one that makes you feel cruddy?

Are you after people knowing the great things you are doing? The feeling you are finally enough? The one-track-mind goal of being published? The phone call that ends your waiting time? The approval of that person that restores your sense of self? The success that erases your feelings of illegitimacy? The desire to be wanted by family members? The spotlight that shows millions accept you?  The achievements that are all about you?

Make no mistake, my fellow seekers, we are all after something. Many of us just don’t acknowledge it – because we are afraid to look at what our heart really wants. We are embarrassed; we don’t really want God after all.

No shame here friends. I get off track all the time. I blow it!

Getting off track is not the major problem,
but remaining in denial of the problem – always is.

Where are you in denial? 

Confront these questions (this means really consider them):

What is your heart’s goal on the daily basis?
Is it about pleasing God or pleasing man?
Seeking self or glorifying God?
Self-protection or God-dedication?

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus,
giving thanks to God the Father through him. Col. 3:17

Draw a line. Draw, not a grey or fuzzy line –
we have enough of those –
but an I-will-do-it-all-in-the-name-of-Jesus line.

Draw a line that says, I will be resolute, determined and steadfast
in only going after the right thing.
In going after – God’s thing.

This way, instead of allowances, excuses and rationalizing, you make progress.
Then, you and I claim a warrior-like mentality. It talks like this:

Speak to me, something that is not from him… I’m not listening.

Divert me with a call to selfish ambition… I’m shutting down.

Send me down a path of sin that will lead me astray…
Nope, I’m not going there, I want God.

Try to get me to make it about me…
I don’t think so. It is all about Him.

Aim my heart at some target off the path of God…
Forget it. That’s not contentment.

We’ve gotta stop doping around.

A woman dedicated to do it God’s way,
finds the upsurgence of God’s heart
ready to explode from within her.

Drive emerges:

Your heart swerves left into discouragement,
but you jerk back and remember how he has always taken care of you.

Your mind stalls –
you pray and uncover your next step to get moving again.

Your doubts backfire –
but you fire back truth that kicks doubt out of the car.

Your friends speak lousy words –
you nod your head and exhale them like exhaust.

Your hard work proves fruitless –
you remember he’s the one taking you somewhere.

You release demands and pressures. You fly free of the strings of the world. No one and nothing is tying you down. Like a hot air balloon, you are released to new heights.

You can see it all, from God’s view.

You move like a woman with laser-vision, dead-set on eternity. You fight hand-and-fist, tooth-and-nail, jackal-style, against the world that wants to wedge its way into your heart. You scream. You run. You stay near God. But, what you don’t do is let it get its sticky fingers on you.

You won’t have it.

And, when it does, when you feel icky because you went the wrong way, so you trash that empty wrapper, as quickly as you can, and say, “It’s not that I have fallen that most concerns God, it is that I get up and get going with him once again.”

And so you do. You just go where he wants to go, knowing that it is the ONLY and the BEST place to go.

A woman dedicated to the Lord
is like a ship anchored to the core of the earth.
What comes against her doesn’t move her an inch.
She is unwavering, unbreakable and unshakable.

Prayer to be an Unshakable Woman

God, help us. Where we are weak, make us strong. Where we are wavering, help us lay our anchor down. May we find strength through knowing you hold us. We no longer need to be held down by the world’s claws. May we believe you are so believable we see your hand in our everything. May we so fall into your arms of grace, so we never feel the pangs of condemnation rip us apart. That is not you. And, truly, we want nothing that is not associated with you – it will only leave us empty. God, you are one that leaves us on full. Not once, but all the time. God, give us you. Increase our faith; make us into fighters who don’t back down. May we know, strongly, you are what we need to run after. You are the answer to everything. You are the only way. Tie down our heart into you. Amen.

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Related Reading:

Magnificently Inspiring Faith Manifesto

Chasing God

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When People Complicate Things

September 19, 2016
purposefulfaith
blessings, Contentment, control, expectations, fear
1 Comment
People Complicate Things

I thought about bringing them in. But, if I do everything will get turned upside down. There will be questions, problems, ideas and suggestions about how I should do things. There will be recommendations for how the games should be played and different ideas on how the event should look. There will be deep discussions on outfits. Whether to serve mushrooms or asparagus. There will be rabbit trails I am too busy to commit to – and honestly could care less about.

I want to move alone. I want to lead the charge.  Is there anything wrong with that?

People = Problems

I like:

Kelly = Leader
People = Quiet doers

Hate me if you will, but I am being completely honest. Sometimes I can’t handle people. I’ve always had an issue with them. They get loud. They get opinionated. They get political. They get whiny. They get long-winded (you open your mouth to speak only to have the words stolen from you). They get advice-oriented, especially when you already have a good plan in motion. They diss your ideas. They judge all the time…! They get critical. They hurt you.

Sometimes it feels better to shove people
down a rabbit hole and cover the top,
then let them give voice to things that might hurt you.

Ever noticed?

I throw them a carrot every now and then if they’ve been good. If they’ve been obedient and rule-sensitive down there.

But, if they’ve been a vwery bad rabbit, I tend to:

– Ignore them.
– Try to advise, derail or shush them.
– Avoid them
– Squeeze them out.
– Talk about them behind their back or in my head.
– Get filled up with so much steam, I exhale scolding words.

I punish those disobedient rascals. Mostly, I punish them because I am afraid of them.

Oh, boy…it’s true.

I am afraid they’ll: look better than me, come up with better ideas than me, steal my show, be liked more by other people, grace the world better than me, make me realize the ugly parts of myself.

Can’t have Kelly feeling uncomfortable! No way, friends. That is the first rule of avoidance. 

Better to diss than be dissed, right? Better to be the first one to walk out on that boyfriend, than to have him dump you. Better to let your eyes roam the room with your eyes, than to have others do it to you. Better to step away than have to deal with your friend liking the other girl more. Better to disassociate than associate with potential pain.

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Phil. 2:3

There’s that…

It looks the opposite of my approach. It’s one of those verses you recite because it sounds so beautiful. It sounds so Jesus. It sounds like, “Yes! I am great and humble and self-sacrificing and writing for Jesus (or fill in whatever holy excuse you use to not really love).

Self-protection is not holy affection, friends.

It’s a sack of nasty pride.

Am I being too hard on you – and on me?

Maybe. We’ve been hurt. It’s been painful. People have played – not nice. I know, I really know. It stinks.

Let’s throw a pout-party and squeeze our face muscles real tight and remember their icky-ness. Let’s.

Then, let’s toss them to the wind. Let’s let them fly away from us, because those past pains are holding us up from receiving present love. We are missing moments. We are losing joy. We are hiding away and into ourselves. We are losing the depths the real warmth that comes from letting someone really knowing you.

Our pride party is pointless.

Our joy is incomplete.

Our glass isn’t half empty, it is depleted.

He who is faithful to love operates in the gaps of people’s messes. If we are looking for pariahs of perfection, they don’t exist, but He does. He will layer in love, where they have left holes. Friends, it is not a person we are looking to fill us, it is God. We find him in the holes of man, for that’s where he leaves us – holy.

Prayer for Recovery of Relationships:
Dear Lord, today, I confess, I get scared. I get scared that someone will hurt me the same way as yesterday. It feels like a very real, present and oncoming threat. Help me trust you. Help me leave my heart in your hands, knowing that your wrapping of it is a covering that no man can penetrate. Help me believe that you are good, even when man is messed up. Help me know that my identity is in you and it is not indicative of man’s opinion. Lead me in your grace, mercy and fearlessness. Amen.

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Related Reading:

When People Are Disgusting

Broken Perfectionism

When you Feel Rejected

September 16, 2016
purposefulfaith
awe, Contentment, doubt, fear
Feel Rejected

We loved each other, I thought. Dashing up to him, I placed a decorated plate of deviled eggs before him, my favorite. I hoped he loved them, because coming off a fresh loss, my heart was hurting and looking for care. I completely botched up the championship basketball game by dropping and kicking the ball out of bounds on the court. Not once, but twice. Whoops. All I wanted sympathy, compassion. My heart hurt – but, little did I know, it was about to hurt even more.

He looked up at me and shoved the eggs away. His eyes said it all, he no longer wanted to know me. I wasn’t good enough. He got up and grabbed something behind the door. It was a woman. Ushering her in by her hand, he carefully sat her down in my chair and gave me the look, “I am done with you. It’s time to go.”

Aimlessly roaming the streets, I found myself homeless. I had only my comforter, a blanket that was a prize from the basketball game. Not knowing where to go, I held it close – it had my teammates signatures on it. I walked on and on.

When someone deserts us, we walk in a desert.

With a million piles of past rejection on us.

I woke. Thank you, God, this was only a dream. But, was it? Perhaps, it is reality.

Have you ever noticed, the rejection today carries the weight of yesterday?  What pours is the same waterfall of emotions.

Just yesterday, I walked outside a military base. I grabbed coffee first. Intending to go in, I stared down at my shirt. Dang it! I’d gone splashed coffee all over myself.

I can’t go in there.
Not around those people in starched up uniforms.
Ones dressed to military perfection.
They’ll stare.
They’ll laugh at my stains.

They’ll see straight into me. They’ll be confronted with my faults. My botch-ups. It is too much, way too much.

Afraid of being a walking eye sore, I stop mid-step – I remembered something…

Whether I’m walking stained or with fresh rejection pain,
just like in my dream, I always walk with the inscribed Comforter.

Do I even give it credence? Do I allow it to serve its purpose?

But the Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby), the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name [in My place, to represent Me and act on My behalf], He will teach you all things. And He will help you remember everything that I have told you. (Jo. 14:26 AMP)

Do you cover yourself with the warmth, protection and safety of the Comforter when you feel uncomfortable? When you feel undone in shame?

You can, because He is with you. We don’t roam this barren earth without support, without care.

As Christians, we can press up against the Comforter who:
1. Leads us in the way we should go. (John 16:13)
2. Brings freedom. (2 Cor. 3:17)
3. Dispenses love and joy. (1 Thess. 1:6)
3. Speaks the mind of Christ to us. (1 Cor. 2:16)
4. Points our heart back to Jesus. (John 16:14-15)

When we draw near the Comforter,
we draw real and tangible strength from the Savior.

Jesus, He chose me, stains and all.
Jesus, He covers me with his love.
Jesus, He did not abandon me. And never will.
Jesus, He will make me white, no matter how coffee-splattered my shirt is.
Jesus, He will reflect light onto me as I turn my darkness into it.

I walked right onto that military base.

I walk, stained, amongst the perfection of starched uniforms, precision strides and measured haircuts.  I walked, me – a stained, plain girl. But what I also walk with – is comfort.

It reminds me, I need not be perfect. I need not be flawless. I need just walk with my Comforter, the one who inscribes the name of Christ on me. Then, suddenly, it is not about me – or giant coffee stains – any longer. I find hope.

“For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.”  (Gal. 6:8)

If I could, I would sow that Comforter right on me. But, you know what? I don’t have to, he’s sowed in me.

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25 Ways: To Let Jesus Reign

Overcome Like Jesus: 7 Ways He Proves You Can

Desperation Can Give Birth to Dedication

September 15, 2016
Katie Reid
Regular Contributor, trials
Desperation can give birth to dedication by Katie M. Reid for Kelly Balarie's Purposeful Faith

Post By: Katie M. Reid

Are you in a desperate situation? Does it feel like you’re facing a brick wall, with no way to get around it? Are you struggling to find hope as the season changes?

In 1 Samuel 1:1-27, 2:1-11 we read about a woman, named Hannah, who found herself in a time of desperation.

Hannah was deeply loved yet she carried around a haunting emptiness. In a time when a woman’s womb was wound up tightly to her worth, Hannah’s barrenness must have flashed “broken” like a neon sign in a dark alley.

Not only was Hannah unable to conceive but her husband’s other wife, Peninnah, had children. Not only did Peninnah have children but she provoked Hannah bitterly about her closed womb (see 1 Samuel 1:6).

Have you known that sting? It’s salt in the wound when you are lacking yet someone nearby holds the very thing you long for. Maybe they aren’t hanging it over your head but deep down you struggle to celebrate with them.

Maybe you are dealing with infertility and Hannah’s account hits a little too close to home? Or maybe you long to birth a book, or have more money in your account, or receive a clean bill of health, or to live somewhere else, or for your husband to be more attentive, or to even have a husband?

No matter what leaves you empty, I think we can all relate to the ache that Hannah carried.

She had a life-giving longing and yet, year after year, she was left unfulfilled.

Have you been there? I have. Like Hannah, I longed for a baby to hold. I had three children at the time but God birthed a deep desire to adopt a child. I assumed my God-given desire would be granted in no time; I was wrong.

Some nights I crept into the empty nursery and rocked. The tears fell and my arms ached as I longed for this baby. Where was this little life that had been conceived in my heart so many months ago?

It is hard to trust God in the dark places, when you can’t see a way out of the tunnel and you wonder if the secret desires of your soul can even be seen at all.

But in those difficult times, we can bring our desperation to the Lord and trust Him with it.

Our desperation can give birth to dedication.

My prayer is that we learn from Hannah, not so much that she finally received what her arms ached for, but that in her anguish she poured out her soul before the Lord (see 1 Samuel 1:15).

-She allowed God to see the depth of her pain (vs. 15).
-She didn’t run from God but ran to Him and asked for intervention (vs. 11-12).
-She believed God could do what she had asked of Him (vs. 17-18).

Now it came about in due time, after Hannah had conceived, that she gave birth to a son; and she named him Samuel, saying, ‘Because I have asked him of the Lord’” (vs. 20, NASB).

Be assured the Lord hears you when you pour out your soul to Him. You can trust Him with the tender places of your heart.

Have you wanted something so badly that it ached? And then to make things worse someone else had what you were longing for. It is irritating and painful, and can leave you hollow; fighting for hope amidst the heap of ashes at your feet.

Left unguarded your ache can drive you away from the Lord or it can drive you to your knees.

Hope can be found at Jesus’ feet. He willingly died on the Cross—and rose again—so that you can be emptied of sin and filled with His Presence.

Like Hannah, may your desperation give birth to dedication as you cling to His unchanging hope despite your circumstances. May Jesus’ love light the way through the gray as you take the next step towards Him.

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Author & Speaker Katie M. Reid image by Adopting Nations
Katie M. Reid is a tightly wound woman, of the recovering perfectionist variety, who fumbles to receive and extend grace in everyday moments. She delights in her hubby, five children, and their life in ministry. Through her writing and speaking, Katie encourages others to find grace in the unraveling of life.

Connect with Katie at katiemreid.com and on Twitter and Facebook.

P.S. Here is a free gift from our heart to yours!

As Katie waited to adopt she recorded an album, Echoes of My Heart. As a special gift Katie is offering a free download of a song from that album entitled, “Waitin’ On Someday”. May you be encouraged as you keep trusting the One is with you through it all.

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