When I get dressed in the morning, I usually put workout clothes on, for two reasons:
– I figure, if I’m wearing them, I’ll be continually reminded as to why.
– They’re easy and expandable.
A few days ago, as I walked out of my closet, my 5-year-old daughter looked at me and proclaimed, “You’re not wearing that, are you?! You look askusting!”
Was she right? Do I really look “askusting”? I kind of felt that way, I guess. The reality was — I hadn’t gotten as much time to take walks now that the kids were home from school.
Then, at dinner last night, all of a sudden she came over and rubbed my belly.
“You’ve got a baby in there. . . See?” She pointed down at my belly.
I looked down and saw the baby bump, with no baby inside.
I look horrible these days. I see the growing lines. I can’t hide the hips. I feel the way “the dryer is shrinking my jeans.” Even my 5-year old can see it.
After these innocent comments, I kept on looking at myself. Do you do the same? What do you see when you look at yourself? The lines? The hips? The nose? The too big ___? The hatred towards ___?
It’s easy for me to tell you, “No. You’re beautiful”. Yet, it’s hard to receive when it’s yourself, isn’t it?
But, I don’t think it really matters what we tell each other — or how much we try to affirm each other. TV tells us how we should be. People, like my daughter, stay stuff. The scale speaks. The advertisements remind us we are not enough. One thousand voices overcome one.
But, all the voices can never overcome the One voice that matters most. If we can choose to hear Him above all else, we will find freedom. If we can see our self through His eyes, before resorting to our own critical eye, we’ll find life.
God sees differently:
God puts our inner heart far above our outer beauty.
“For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Sam. 16:7)
Jesus came not to judge us, but to save us from (self-)condemnation.
God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him. (Jo. 3:17)
We are growing more and more into the beauty of Christ.
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. (2 Cor. 4:16)
While the world gives matter to looks, God sees in us: the righteousness of Christ, His holiness, children of God, a new creation, daughters, a holy priesthood, saints, chosen people.
We look beautiful in His eyes.
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I struggle with this, too. Thank you for the reminders.
I always wish I was thinner.At 68 it is getting harder to be that way.
Recently, I was being particularly critical of myself (head to toe) and all of a sudden, I felt like God whispered to me that I was criticizing His handiwork…His handiwork that He calls good and beautiful. That moment gave me a perspective I’d been lacking. Surely I do not want to be critical of something He took the time to form and fashion! Kind of a wake-up call for me.
Thank you for sharing, Val. What you said brought tears to my eyes. I will try to remember that for myself because I’m always so critical of myself.