Category - faith

When Communication Goes Wrong

December 13, 2023

My daughter said something that I couldn’t entirely make out from the front seat of the car. Still, I knew where she was going with this whole line of thinking. She’d talked like this 100 times, so I instinctively blurted out, “Don’t even think about doing that!”

Suddenly, there was silence. And more silence. I glanced in the rearview mirror to see what was going on. It was then, when I saw her destroyed face, that I knew I did something horribly wrong…

“Mom, did you even hear what I said?” she asked.

“Umm…” I muttered.

My heart sank. An assumption in my mind effectively trampled the goodness flowing out of her heart. She didn’t say something wrong; she was saying something good.

I’m horrible.

I’m learning that when assumption or presumption direct my conversation, it usually leads to contention. I have been guilty of this with my husband, too.

Especially, when I say things like:

You always…
You never…
I know he will…

Negative declarations over my husband, set me up to walk in presumption and assumption. Rather than giving my husband the benefit of the doubt and space to do a new thing, I put faith in an expected outcome, and offer him no space to try out a new thing. All this furthers offense and solidifies negative patterns.

We butt heads. Old cycles continue, on repeat. We both are on edge.

Ever been there? Maybe your husband does that to you. I know it hurts.

In the bible, the Pharisees were fast assumption-makers about Jesus when he cast out a demon.

“. . . they said . . . “it is only by Beelzebub, the prince of demons, that this fellow drives out demons.” But Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand.” (Mt. 12:24-25)

To assume and presume is to fill the supernatural gap where God wants to move with our own naturally-minded nonsense. It’s like bridging a gap with icky gum, rather than allowing God to construct his bridge of solid rock, so we can effectively cross over into a new way of being and going.

Carnally-minded, non-grace giving words, tear down not only things of the Lord and passages to new ways of going, but also, our very own houses.

“A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands.” (Prov. 14:1)

God shows us another way to breakthrough:
“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” (Eph. 4:29)

What would it look like for you to extend grace before the recipient even deserves it? How might that change the face of your relationship?

If you want more wisdom, strength and practical help for your marriage, join the “Help My Marriage Workshop” this Thursday (tomorrow), December 14th live or via recording.

Gain strength for your marriage, as well as:
1. Practical strategies to believe God when everything looks dark and dim.
2. Breakthrough testimonies and stories to help you persevere.
3. Prayer strategy that defeats the devil’s schemes.
4. Ways to set up boundaries that safeguard your heart and your children.
5. Prayer and encouragement.

Prayer: Father, I repent of believing lies. Help me to see those around me through your eyes of love. Let me believe the best, instead of rashly thinking the worst. Give me grace to have hope in every relationship. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

5 Ways We Hinder our Prayers

December 8, 2023

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, grace, hope

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Have you ever had a stopped-up shower? Ick! Or, even worse, have you ever had a stopped-up toilet? It is the absolute worst. The other day, my husband had to go out and buy a plunger because our toilet was about to explode with stuff you don’t want me to describe. The pipe was clogged, and — let me just tell you, to put it nicely, things needed to flow (somewhere else)!

Just as things could not flow where they needed to because they were hindered by toilet paper, did you know that our prayers can be hindered too? Stopped up? Thwarted?

When this happens, it can create a horrible stop-up in our life. The painful things that need to clear out, just don’t. What we want to be over and done with, sticks around. What stinks, stays.

Might your prayers be hindered or blocked?

There are 5 things that can block or stop our prayers. The 5 hindrances are:

1. We turn away from doing what is right and, instead, do what is evil, without confessing our sins.

If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened. (Ps. 66:18)
*Iniquity means: wickedness or sin

If one turns away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer is an abomination. (Prov. 28:9)

For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” (1 Pet. 3:12)

2. We do not extend compassion and grace to others.

In the same way you married men should live considerately with [your wives], with an intelligent recognition [of the marriage relation], honoring the woman as [physically] the weaker, but [realizing that you] are joint heirs of the grace (God’s unmerited favor) of life, in order that your prayers may not be hindered … (1 Pet. 3:7)

While I know this verse is directed towards husbands, women are equally called to remember we are joint-heirs of grace and to extend that grace accordingly. To be angry and bitter, I believe, impacts a lot in our spiritual life.

3. We ask with selfish ambition or from soulish self-centered motives.

You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. (Ja. 4:3)
And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. (1 Jo. 5:14)

4. We ask without confidence in Him and without faith that He will do what we asked Him to do.

If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. (Jo. 15:7)

And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith.” (Mt. 21:22)

“And Jesus answered them, “Have faith in God. Truly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” (Mk. 11:22-24)

5. We do not forgive others.

“And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” (Mk. 11:25)

What might be blocking you? Friends, the first place to start is repentance. Tell God, you are sorry. By doing this, you will find the flow is opened up once again. You will unblock the pipe. You will permit God to do what He so desires to do: help you!

Absolutely, the grace of God is enough to cover our mistakes, but if we willfully want to go our own way, God doesn’t pin us to the ground and force us to go His way. He is kind, patient and slow to anger.

In the past, I have thought the issue was God. I’d ask, “Where is He? Why hasn’t He shown up?”

Later, would come a day when I’d fall on my knees and realize the pride of me, kept me from the love of Him. I had inadvertently blocked His help. I had stopped His miraculous help!

If you are in this sort of place, where nothing is happening, may I encourage you? Turn towards your Father and clear out any hinderances. He loves you. He has good gifts for you. He wants to help you. He wants to give to you. Just as I want to give amazing Christmas gifts to my kids, He wants to give to you, too!

Unblock the flow!

Prayer: Father, give us clean hands and a pure heart. Show us if there is any wrong way within us. Forgive us for anything we may have done against you. Lead us to you — to the Good Shepherd, to our Defender and to our Provider. Hear our prayer and give us your peace. Hear the cry of our heart and answer us today. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

P.S. The “Help My Marriage Workshop” is next Thursday, December 14. You can also access it by recording. Register here.

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Thanks Welcomes More of God

November 22, 2023

purposefulfaith

faith, hope, Jesus

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“Thank you, mommy.”

Oh my goodness, my friends, every time my kids say these three simple words, it blesses me wildly. Usually in a case like this, I find myself in the middle of a parking lot, holding a load of grocery bags, but everything in me wants to drop everything to hug the living daylights out of them.

Always, my heart cries out something like:

God, thank you!!! My kids see my heart for them. They know my love. They recognize how much I want to give them the very best. They appreciate my heart to provide them simple pleasures. They have moved my heart.

And, I can’t help but think, today… just as their thanks moved my heart, my thanks moves God’s heart.

Just as I want to do a little happy-dance due to my kids’ thankful heart, I wonder if God feels the same way? Just as my children appreciate sacrifice and it moves me to embrace them in love, does my thanks move God to want to embrace me, too? Just as I overflow with the desire to give my kids even more after they give thanks, does God want to pour out more on me, also?

This could be! Scripture says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 4:6-7)

We pray away harm, while we thank God for who He is and guess what happens? He gives peace. We petition for God’s protection and we end up with a God-embrace that guards our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Friends, “thanks” is not only a nice thing we do and say, but it is a weapon of spiritual warfare. Thanks is not only a spiritual weapon, but it is protection. It mounts guard over our heart and mind. Thanks is not only something God asks us to do, but it is an important component of prayer that works. Thanks gives us power to move forward with peace that causes us to think straight, that empowers wise decisions, and that yields wise reactions.

This Thanksgiving, don’t let thanks end after Thursday. Let it reign in your heart. Thank God for who He is, what He has done and what He will do, thanks to His faithfulness. Thank Him for all He has saved you from. Thank Him for His son. Thank Him for the ways He has helped your families.

Thank Him for saving your life.

Prayer: Father, you have given me so many good gifts in my life. I thank you always take care of me. I thank you that you know every detail of what you are doing with my life. I see a string that doesn’t always make sense, but you know exactly how you are weaving that tapestry into something beautiful. I trust you. I thank you, Father, that who you are is worthy of all my trust. I give that to you today. I thank you for saving me and for loving me. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

P.S. It’s not too late to get a copy of the “Faith Workshop” recording. If you need faith now or you want to trust God more, sign up to get the recorded version. Those who attended found it “inspiring”, “freeing” and “encouraging.” Stand firm in faith and peace. Discover why we go through hard times. Receive encouragement and hope. To watch the recording, click here.

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Know, God Won’t Fail You

November 14, 2023

purposefulfaith

faith, hope

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Driving, I found myself amazed at the weirdest thing!

I know it sounds odd, friends, but isn’t it incredible that highway overpasses actually work? Think of it…three cars can drive directly above us, and yet, the overhead structures never collapse. They don’t buckle under the pressure. Even more, we have no fear of driving under them. We never think twice about their collapse. We know these overhead bridges are sturdy.

But, do we know God’s love is sturdy? Do we know His faithfulness is sturdy? Or, do we trust a bridge to be more faithful than our God?

“He will cover you with his feathers.
He will shelter you with his wings.
His faithful promises are your armor and protection.” (Ps. 91:4 NLT)

God’s promises keep and protect us; they are far more sturdy than any natural thing we rely on to keep safe.

Do we really trust God? Some of us are traveling down roads, yet we are turning back in fear, in doubt and in double-mindedness thinking that God’s way, God’s road, and God’s promises won’t work for us.

If that is you, this Thursday evening is an event you must attend!

I am having a 1-night workshop called, “Stand Strong in Faith — in the Gap of Not-Yet-Answered Prayers & Extremely Hard Times”.

During this workshop, we will:
1. Find practical tips and encouragement to stand strong in faith.
2. Ditch debilitating fear, doubt and worry; learn 3 practical ways to stand strong.
3. Regain trust in a God who is always-faithful.
4. Gain support and empathy from sisters who understand.
5. Pray for one another, as we trust the God who hears us.

Join me for a night of refreshment, encouragement and grace-giving empowerment.

Register here: “Stand Strong in Faith” Workshop
November 16, 2023 at 6:00 ET via Zoom.
*Recording available.
$25.00

Lately, I have been in awe of God. God IS answering so many prayers. Children are finding joy again. Job provision is coming in. Healing is showing up for people. I want to pray for you. I believe God will move powerfully on releasing fresh hope and that He will also show up on our prayers for one another during this call, too. I’m excited!

Let’s join hands together and find refreshment in the Lord!

Testimonials:

“Kelly is a great encourager! Her greatest desire is that you should know who the Lord created you to be and who you are as a daughter.” – M.R.

“Kelly brought light into my very dark world by demonstrating what the true love of Jesus looks like!” – D.P.

“Kelly’s “realness”, no matter the cost has helped liberate me from all the masks I carried. Christ uses her to powerfully deliver freedom in every conversation.” – S.A.

Even better, gift a friend in need with this session. It will change their life.

*Subscribe for all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

When Fear Seems Overwhelming

November 8, 2023

purposefulfaith

faith, hope, No Fear

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I awoke. It was the middle of the night. Fear was tangible. Sweat nearly broke out on my brow…The weight of the world pressed on my chest.

Would everything work out? Will I be okay? Will my kids come out of this alright? Will God really come through? What have I done? Can I really trust Him now?

Laying there, with no voice but my own, I acknowledged how my mental trek was soon to become an unstoppable train wreck, leaving me in emotional ruin. I’d been here before. I know how mental agitation gives way to endless ruminations that speak louder than the consolation of the Holy Spirit. Undoubtedly, I was about to lose all semblance of control, as well as peace and sleep.

I was at a crossroad…which way would I go? Would I give in to more thinking, pondering, circling, rehashing, ruminating and figuring — or would I tell that demonic spirit of fear to leave me, putting these unruly thoughts to bed once and for all?

Maybe you’ve been there…Maybe you are there today. Maybe fear is gripping you, and your mind feels out of control with figuring things out. Maybe you have a child who has gone astray. A daughter who is on drugs. A husband who won’t stop drinking. A job that feels tormenting. A dream that seems impossible. A financial bank account that is in ruins.

Maybe the devil is knocking on the door of your mind saying, “God, won’t really do it. He won’t really help you. He won’t really come in time.” Maybe you are losing faith and hope that things can be different?

Is that you?

You know what I decided to do the night I almost mentally train wrecked? I put a stake in the ground. I said, “Satan, get out of here; I don’t want to hear you anymore.”

I shut his trap right on up! And, I went back to sleep. In the morning, I wasn’t bothered.

Dear friends, for some of you, the enemy has been talking your ear off. And, you’ve been listening. No wonder you’re agitated and not at rest. No wonder you feel full of fear and not faith.

But, no longer, sisters!!! The time is now to put a stake in the ground and tell the enemy you will not cower in fear, because you are going to stand in faith.

I want to share with you my battle-practiced, time-tested breakthrough strategies to stand in faith, when the world is crumbling on you. They work, because I’ve lived them, honed them, leaned on them, cried through them, and trusted God with them.

I’ve lived them through sickness, weakness, injury, hopelessness, difficulty, abuse, torment, and marital troubles. God has kept me going.

I am having a 1-night workshop called, “Stand Strong in Faith — in the Gap of Not-Yet-Answered Prayers & Extremely Hard Times”.

During this workshop, we will:
1. Learn 5 ways to stand strong in faith.
2. Pray in a way that disarms fear.
3. Know and rely on God in a way that gives you peace.
4. Gain support and empathy from sisters who understand.
5. Pray for one another, as we trust the God who hears us.

Join me for a night of refreshment, encouragement, and grace-giving empowerment.
Register here: “Stand Strong in Faith” Workshop
November 16, 2023 at 6:00 ET via Zoom.
*Recording available.

Jesus said, “Do not let your hearts be troubled (distressed, agitated). You believe in and adhere to and trust in and rely on God; believe in and adhere to and trust in and rely also on Me.” (Jo. 14:1)

We do not need to live troubled; we have a Savior, Redeemer, Restorer, and Power far greater than anything we see with our natural eye.

Testimonials:
“Kelly is a great encourager! Her greatest desire is that you should know who the Lord created you to be and who you are as a daughter.” – M.R.

“Kelly brought light into my very dark world by demonstrating what the true love of Jesus looks like!” – D.P.

“Kelly’s “realness”, no matter the cost has helped liberate me from all the masks I carried. Christ uses her to powerfully deliver freedom in every conversation.” – S.A.

Even better, gift a friend in need with this session. It will change their life.

*Subscribe for all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.

P.S. I have an amazing email editor. Frankly, I’m horrible at grammar. She’s talented. If you need someone to help you with proofreading or editing, please consider Proofed by Pearl. For more information, visit: https://blinq.me/N95Try18DzzY

Seeing Through Eyes of Faith

October 24, 2023

purposefulfaith

faith, hope, trials

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I sat on my friend’s floor, coiling a long telephone cord around my stubby index finger.

A high school boy had not called her back after she had tried calling him multiple times. I was interested to see how another person, rejected like me, would handle things. It felt good, in that moment to know that I was not alone. She was hurting too now. Misery loves company.

But, she didn’t indulge me how I wanted…her response threw me off. Rather than saying, like I would, “There must be something wrong with me,” she said, “Oh, he’s probably busy and will call me later.”

That surprised me. It wasn’t all her fault.

She didn’t believe the worst about herself…
She didn’t blame herself…
She didn’t think she was flawed…

Instead, she gave the guy the benefit of the doubt. She hoped the best and believed the best for him and herself.

And because of that, she side-stepped all the self-blame, self-hatred, and burdening personalization that I so shamefully and easily walked in.

How was it so easy for her to escape all that?

As she saw it, there was nothing wrong with her, but for me? It was all — ALL my fault.

I wonder if any of you are like me? How often do we personalize what likely has nothing to do with us, thereby heaping pain and self-blame on ourselves?

How often do we decide our kids’ walk is our fault? Our marriage is our fault? Our situation is our fault? People’s responses are our fault?

“Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].” (1 Cor 13:7)

We are to love ourselves. Do you doubt that?

God tells us to “love others as we love ourselves”, therefore, we are to:

1. Believe the best about ourselves
2. Hope there is a good future for ourselves
3. Endure up under ourselves with belief even in the face of our flaws.

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” (Heb. 11:1)

Faith is all about what we hope for.

If we have no hope, we have no faith. If we have no faith, we turn off the faucet flow of the greater things God can and will do for us.

My friend had hope; I had none.

It’s no wonder I got an eating disorder and was ready to die. Without hope, all life dies. Faith can generate nothing new and life-giving.

But, in us, my friends, we have Jesus, the hope of glory! Which means there is always hope! There is always resurrection life power. There is always a new way!

A weekend ago, I spoke at a church, where Jesus came with radical power to heal people of sickness, mental illness, and pain. I have never seen anything like it. The women’s faith believed in the hand of a Saving God! And He came!

If He did it for them, He will do it for you! Have faith that what God has for others could also be for the likes of you, too!

Prayer: Father, you are great. You are mighty. You are able. You are maker. You have good things in store for those who love you. I cast off me for the receiving of you. I let go of what I am not, for the faith that you are bigger than me and my mistakes. I trust you. Life is not about me, but it is for the glory of you! So, today I lean on you and trust in you! You make all things new. You have things in store for me. You have good for me. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Grounds for Love

September 20, 2023

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, hope

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I could not get the coffee grounds in the trash! The way my husband tightly packed the grounds into the tight quarters of the machine made removing them impossible. Ugh.

I asked him to pack the coffee into the machine lighter, so it would all fall easier into the trash, but…we all know how it is…life gets busy, mornings get going and coffee is not a huge deal in the grand scheme of life. So, those grounds continually were packed super tight, making it an impossible annoyance to throw away on a daily basis.

Grr…

And, while coffee is most certainly a first-world problem, don’t we all know? It’s often the small things that create big annoyances that have power to topple many dominoes over in our day.

Ever been there? One thing sets you off to be annoyed, then you react to another, which makes something else happen — and you find yourself somewhere emotionally that you don’t want to be?

I needed wisdom on how to handle this. God’s wisdom.

“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.” (James 3:17)

The wisdom I got? I decided to empty out my grounds each time. So, instead of leaving my grounds in the coffee machine for him to empty, I emptied my grounds. And, guess what happened? I set a precedent. In turn, he emptied his grounds.

I didn’t have to say a word.
I didn’t have to nag.
I didn’t have to tell him what to do.
I didn’t have to get angry inside anymore.

I just set an example in love and he responded in same.

I am writing this post today, because I got the feeling that some of us are fighting battles in words, when God is calling us to show love through our deeds. Some are angry at others for what they are not doing, when God may be calling us to do something new. Many are fighting battles God did not call us to fight, when He wants to bring our justice. Others are using anger as a weapon, yet anger never leads one to righteousness (see: James 1:20). A group is waiting for them to change, while every day banging their head against the same wall.

Here, I ask: What is the Lord calling you to do? What is wisdom saying about how to handle this problem? What is understanding leading you to do through a sincere heart and love?

There may be another solution to your hard problem.

While this coffee story is so simple, it is emblematic of our greater issues that lay at hand. There is no greater testimony than a living one, one done through a heart of service and love.

“Love never fails.” (1 Cor. 13:8) Love is the highest wisdom and understanding we can ever have. Let’s use it and see it work.

What is love calling you to do?

Father God, I thank you that our highest calling is to love. Show us how to love and what it looks like in our hard problems. Lead us in your love. Empower us not to be offended, agitated or angry. Make us into living testimonies that shine your glory and grace far and wide. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Adventuring with God!

September 11, 2023

purposefulfaith

Contentment, faith, hope, Love & Health

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The boat turned off course. What was going on!? Two minutes ago, we were cruising down a clear water channel, one where I could see for what seemed to be miles. Now, out of nowhere, my boat was crashing into some reeds. Tall ones, I might add. We couldn’t even see beyond the boat’s bow.

Would we be okay? Would we hit land?

Ironically, I didn’t think either of those thoughts. What I thought was, “Wow! This is exhilarating!”

I loved…
the wind flying my hair a mile a minute…
the horsepower of the boat propelling us beyond ordinary…
the brute speed turning charted lands into uncharted ones.

Now I was getting somewhere! Now I was really living!

We were pioneering new lands! We were going where man had not gone before.

Something in me came alive. Why? I am not meant to live an ordinary life, but an extraordinary one, in Christ Jesus.

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

What if I lived like I actually believed that? Believing every calling and purpose of God for my life was possible? That God really would give me every bit of providence, sustenance and horsepower I needed to do His will? That the beaten track, the boring, ordinary and commonplace, could be ditched, in order to move out on a thrill ride — His new course, as I follow Jesus, just like the disciples?

Is Jesus calling you? Is there a new attitude, new land, new friend, or new role that you feel nudged to move into? Is there more abundant giving, more adventurous international going or new ways of relating that He is beckoning you into?

Ditch the ordinary and find His extraordinary! Don’t let complacency or convenience connive you into boring living! There is nothing worse than living Groundhog Day on repeat; it makes a soul lose luster.

Friend, get going — in following Him.

Jesus is calling. You can do this. He will help you. All things are possible with God.

You don’t need to know the way — for HE DOES!

The thrill of the ride, the joy of your heart and the land of promise — is only found as you adventure with God. Grab His hand and walk with Jesus!

Prayer: Father, thank you that you are in control. As we let go, you take hold. As we cast our cares on the Lord, you handle them. Please give us bravery, boldness and strength to follow Jesus. Please give us your empowerment from Heaven to do all you have for us to do in this life. We want to obey and follow you. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Avoiding a Hard Heart

September 2, 2023

purposefulfaith

faith, Holy Spirit, hope

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Friends, let me start by saying…I DO NOT have it all together.

I got this message loud and clear when, two days ago, I pulled a steel crab pot out of the Chesapeake Bay waters. My catch of two weeks’ worth of crabs made my pot heavy. I knew if I used all my weight and if I leaned back hard, I could leverage the steel pot up, hopefully without launching myself over the dock. So, I did just that.

Victory.

Exasperated, I leaned back for a second and stared at the fruit of my labor on that weather-worn dock. What did I see? It suddenly occurred to me: Hard-shelled, violent creatures fighting one another, claws out…

They were relentlessly aiming to eat each other alive.

Upon reflection, I wondered — is this me? Have I become hard-shelled?

“God, I know what I am doing. I have this handled.”
“God, you should have come through like this.”
“God, I shouldn’t be here.”

Or, hard-shelled with family members?

“I must defend myself.”
“I’m right.”
“I can’t receive what they’re saying, because their motives are off and this threatens who I am.”

I can’t help but think that my hard shell blocks out not only people, but also the voice of God. Who can hear with mufflers on. Hard shells muffle God-sent voices.

Hard shells also make fighters out of people. Everyone is a threat. Protection creates isolation in that person’s life.

I want none of it.

Today, I soften down. I haven’t come to be right in this world, I have come to be soft, to be real, to love others no matter what it may make exposed and vulnerable within me.

What about you? Where might you need to soften? Where might you need to ditch the cover so God’s voice can penetrate your heart?

Prayer: Father God, I thank you that you are my Protector, Provider and Keeper. I ask for grace and power to trust you more. I ask for help believing you when I feel afraid. You are my God. You are my Lord. You are my Protector. You are a stronghold and a fortress. Let me lean on you when the going gets tough. Equip me for this, even right now, Father. In Jesus’ name.

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Admitting What is Hard to Admit

August 15, 2023

purposefulfaith

faith, grace, hope

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Hey friends — I was on the 700 Club this week talking about Take Every Thought Captive! I hope the segment blesses you. Watch here.

BLOG POST:

I knew I was wrong. But, changing course and admitting wrongdoing, I knew, would hurt too much to do. Why? During the whole course of the discussion, I defended my position adamantly. I was so sure. I made myself out to be a saint with all the right answers…but now? Now that I was beginning to see the light of my error? Grr…

It’s embarrassing to feel caught and exposed. Like a wild animal caught in a cage, flashlight probing its eyes, all one can do is stand there, not sure of where to go. Like this animal, I paced around in my mind, considering what to do. Will this person still think good things about me? Will they berate me after I admit: I was wrong? Will my opinion still be valued going forward? Will I have to radically change — and, can I even make this change?

Sometimes, it’s easier to deny wrongdoing than to admit it. Sometimes, it is easier to keep pride than to give away ego. Sometimes, it is easier to maintain your sense of self than to die to the flesh.

I think Nicodemus, when talking to Jesus, may have understood these feelings.

“Now there was a certain man among the Pharisees named Nicodemus, a ruler (a leader, an authority) among the Jews, Who came to Jesus at night and said to Him, Rabbi, we know and are certain that You have come from God [as] a Teacher; for no one can do these signs (these wonderworks, these miracles—and produce the proofs) that You do unless God is with him.” (John 3:1-2 AMPC, emphasis added)

Nicodemus said, “We know…you have come from God.”

This means, there was more than one Pharisee or religious leader who knew the truth about Jesus — but, they were not saying anything!

If the Pharisees “knew” why keep it a secret? Why not come out and say, “This man, Jesus, is from God?” Why not announce, “Only one from God can do the works this man does!?” Why not tell all, “Certainly, God is with this man”?

There is only one reason, much like the reason I had for not speaking up — pride.

Pride that thinks:
If we are wrong about this man, what will the people think about us?
If He is from God, what will we mattter anymore?
If all know that God is with Him, how will we have to change?
If He is more than us, what will happen to us?
Pride kept the Pharisees from fully receiving Jesus.

That’s what pride does. It keeps us from admitting, receiving and confessing truth, even when we blatantly know it is true. Pride makes us preserve our flesh rather than die to it. I wonder, how often has pride caused you to deny, rationalize or to hide away because you don’t want to get hurt?

Friends, I know pride. I know what it is to want to stay safe. I, probably like you, have been hurt in the past. Yet, I know this — when we are honest, we free ourselves. We free ourselves from shame, from fear, and from circular mental traps. Remember, it is only the truth that will set us free.
The Pharisees full-out denied Jesus out of pride. It is easy to point the finger at them, but how often do we do the same thing?

What truth, may you need to admit, in that hard moment, even though it feels like it may kill you?

“He must increase, but I must decrease.” (Jo. 3:30)

Prayer: Father, forgive me of my pride. Give me the power to decrease so that you may increase. Just as Jesus died to Himself, help me. Just as Jesus laid down defenses, help me. Just as Jesus humbled himself, may I do the same. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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