A unique opportunity was given to me – and then completely taken away.
I could have brought so much to the table. I knew I would have done a great job. I knew God would have used me in a powerful way. I so badly wanted to be used. I so badly wanted to give all I had.
But, I wasn’t chosen. In a sense, I was left behind.
I just needed the chance. Why not me God?
I just needed someone to believe in me. God, can’t you clear a path for me?
Am I not good enough for your blessings? Not special enough to move your mighty hand?
Like a mother removing a treat from a child’s hands, God was pulled away what was mine. I threw a tantrum of my own and wallowed in hurt feelings and disappointment.
God had given, only to rip away.
The moment of his gift- lost.
The sweetness of the moment – handed to someone else.
Bad, bad, bad thoughts rushed in, like:
“One day they will see…they should have picked me.”
“I could have done this better. I would have been different, but more impactful.”
“I will do great things one day and they will say, ‘We made a mistake, we should have given her the chance.'”
God loves reaching curtained hearts,
the ones covered by pounds and pounds of fabric
that hide his show
– and cover his glow.
He opens our eyes. He pulls back the curtains. He places our eyes on him. The one who is center stage. The director of all, so we don’t miss it. So we don’t miss his truth.
So we see what is really at play.
And, what God said to my open, plaint and needy self was:
“(Kelly), are you saying,
‘I will ascend to the heavens;
I will raise my throne
above the stars of God;
I will sit enthroned on my mount…,
on the utmost heights…
I will ascend above the tops of the clouds;
I will make myself like the Most High?'”
Is. 14:12-14
Is that what you are saying, dear child? Because these words sound sadly familiar.
Words like:
“They will see my majesty.”
“They will see my glory.”
“They should have recognized me.”
“I will go so high.”
“I will one day show them.”
My heart was shocked. My eyes were open and his truth was flat out in front of me.
I was bowing down to the antithesis of truth.
To the great opposer of humility.
The enemy Father.
The enemy who says, God will leave you high and dry,
because he is up in the sky.
The enemy who points to your powerless as a weakness.
The enemy who shakes your feet to walk you straight away from the heart of Christ.
He is effective. Powerful. Cunning.
We are his best target, because if he can hit us, he can momentarily thwart the plans of God in our lives. He can run our heart amuck in fear, worry and worthlessness. How can one living here, truly honor God?
Yet, If I keep God’s truth front and center I realize:
He may not give me the good I want in today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.
This role may count for another’s soul.
My heart needs to learn a lesson in humility, so I can go to these places with stability.
When we are forced to step down, God steps up to teach our hearts deeper love.
God doesn’t want us reliant on opportunities, he want’s us reliant on him – the King.
He is forming us into a shadow-image of Christ, that should be our highest desire.
When it seems that God has taken away, the truth is – he has always given.
He has given us an opportunity to see his hand work in our heart. He has given us a chance to get on our knees. He has always given us a pliant heart.
He has given me a chance to be a foot warrior of contentment in the face of opposition and defeat. That is powerful.
He has shown me that the greatest victories aren’t in the big things we do for God, but in the small ways we endure, by faith, in defeat.
Now, my eyes are open to the workings of God.
Perhaps my greatest gift was found more in what I didn’t get, than what I did. For, what I didn’t get forged lessons and a heart condition that will last to eternity. What I could have gotten would have been done in a moment.
God is always giving us his best. Don’t let the devil fool you.
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. (James 4:7)
ON ANOTHER NOTE – 2 Quick Updates/Announcements:
1. I am delighted to tell you that I am introducing a new regular contributor to the fold at Purposeful Faith. This woman has spoken so many times to my needy and controlled heart. Her words have been like a soothing oil on the rough parts of my striving. She is a #RaRalinkup Cheerleader already and certainly a woman I call friend. I know that so many of you already know and love her. Certainly, you will be blessed by her words to come on this site.
Let’s welcome Katie Reid as a regular Purposeful Faith contributor!
Join us this Thursday to support her big debut!
2. Compel members/future members – Join us tomorrow (Wednesday) on Twitter for the Compel Twitter party. Share a #CompelTip that you learned. On Thursday and Friday, linkup here.
Get all Purposeful Faith blog posts by email – click here.
Loading InLinkz ...
Beautiful words straight from God to us. His truth is the only truth but when we see that “treat” right in front of our eyes and then it is gone just as quickly, it can be devastating. I have found myself in that position many times. God’s next steps are always better but at that moment I always felt the need to question and throw a little fit. Keep sharing all God is laying on your heart. You minister to many and especially me. Love this beautiful community and you!
Thank you Mary. God has the best steps for us. How right you are. I am blessed to have such Godly women all around me. Thank you for your love Mary. It touches me.
Kelly, this post is true. He “prowls around like a lion looking to destroy”. May we be alert and not deceived by the trickery of the devil. Amen!
Let’s keep him far far away – and flee! Thanks for the comment Kia!
[…] link up with these communities: Holly Barrett’s #TestimonyTuesday, Kelly Balarie’s #RaRalinkup, Jennifer Dukes Lee’s #TellHisStory, Holley Gerth’s Coffee for Your Heart, and Grace […]
Thanks for sharing your heart so openly, Kelly! We’re all had thoughts like that too. This is something I need to hang on to: “He may not give me the good I want in today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.” Oh to step back and see God’s perspective!
How great to see that Katie will be a regular contributor here! Will look forward to her post.
Yes, he is always working to bring about beauty, majesty and glory. We have the ASAP-mentality, he has the in-my-good-time philosophy. ha! Much love to you today Betsy!
Thank you dear Betsy!
Welcome Katie! Your words are always bold and brave yet gentle and loving. What a great addition you will be to a wonderful team of writers! And Kelly, I love your words today. I know we have all been there, sometimes letting that doubt look to others chosen ano feel less-than. But God is so good, and He always reveals the better plan He has especially for us:) Thanks for the good word, friend!
Thank you Kristine for sharing your response to these words. Doubt is such a sneaky one, isn’t it? You are beyond a special gift to me. I thank God for every inch of who he created you to be. Thank you for joining me in this pursuit to share Christ.
Thank you for your encouragement Kristine. 🙂
Thank you for your incredible honesty here, Kelly! I have certainly been in a similar situation with the same reaction. This is so true: “He may not give me the good I want in today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.” Many times when he takes something away, it is so He can give us something so much better. Many blessings to you, sweet friend!
It is such a hard place, but it’s a place where we can grab God’s grace. Thank you for blessing me today with the words of your heart and how this touched you, Candace.
Oh, Kelly- I’ve been there many times. Thanks for sharing your honest wrestlings with God’s plan, pride, and the enemy. I love your pure heart and how He is using your gifts to encourage others… right where you are. And this line is for my journal: “My heart needs to learn a lesson in humility, so I can go to these places with stability.” Thank you.
Thank you Karen. I so badly want to be pure. It is a fight sometimes, but God is ever-working and ever-loving. I pray that we learn our lessons in stability so we can walk with him in humility!
Thanks so much for this, I have been struggling all week with thinking God has passed me over, that I have missed my opportunity. I love this reminder to get low in humility and let God do the exalting. Amazing!
Lord, bless Kaylie. Help her to see your hand over all she is doing. Bless her paths, open doors and instruct her heart in your truth. Amen.
OH- And one more thing… I LOVE that Katie will be contributing regularly! I do know and love her and am thrilled that she will be partnering you here! yay!!
Yipee for Katie! I am delighted to be instructed in her grace for those women who have a hard time resting!
Thank you Karen. You know what a fan I am of your writing- but I like to tell you regularly anyway. 🙂
[…] P.S. I’m linking up today with Kelly Balarie at Purposeful Faith. […]
[…] Sharing with Titus 2sday, Titus 2 Tuesday, Testimony Tuesday, RA RA Linkup […]
[…] And if you aren’t familiar with the popular 60’s sitcom, My Three Sons, here is a snippet of the theme song! Sharing with Sunday Stillness, Give me Grace, Living Proverbs 31, Good Morning Mondays, Sharing His Beauty, Mama Moments Monday, Amaze Me Monday, Modest Monday, Titus 2 Tuesdays, UNITE, Tell me a true story, Titus 2sday, RA RA Linkup […]
“He may not give me the good I want today because he is preparing me for the great tomorrow.” It is so hard to wait and live for God’s best. Especially when I feel so passed over at times. Thank you for speaking directly to my heart today. The heart that is trying to so hard to be faithful with little so that someday I can be trusted with a lot!
He has you. He is working things out. He won’t let go until it is accomplished. Thank you Samantha for sharing the reflection of your heart regarding this post.
Oh, how the evil one seeks to deceive. He is a liar and the father of all deception. What a powerful lesson to learn about how easily he twists the ways God is working in our lives – to convince us that we have been rejected and abandoned. I love the words you shared, “He may not give me the good I want today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.” When difficulties comes, we must hold onto the things we are sure of – that He is good, that He is always with us, that He has plans to prosper us and not to harm us, and that He loves us beyond measure.
Thank you for sharing, sweet friend,
Kamea
He tricks us that guy. We have to be ever so wise to catch his manipulations before they trap us. Thank you Jesus that you have overcome!
This is so timely, Kelly. I love this: “Perhaps my greatest gift was found more in what I didn’t get, than what I did.” Thank you for encouraging me today. Love the #RaRalinkup!
I love God’s timing, don’t you Stephanie? Oh, how I praise him that this reached your heart. He is at work in you, no doubt about it.
Oh Kelly, love this: “Perhaps my greatest gift was found more in what I didn’t get, than what I did.” Great to remember today. Love seeing Katie’s sweet face as an addition to your blog team and I’m so excited about the Compel linkup this week!
It’s only in retrospect that we can see this, in most cases. But, he so has us Kim. Oh, how grateful I am!
And, I am super excited about Katie. She is going to bless our socks off, I just know it!
Thank you lovely Kim- hugs.
“Perhaps my greatest gift was found more in what I didn’t get, than what I did.” Brilliant Kelly! Thanks for encouraging me today! and for hosting this link up always. #RaRalinkup
Welcome Katie!!! Blessings
W/Love,
Tayrina from TGAWrites
Thank you Tayrina. I love how God is so much greater than our limited points of view. HE is a God worthy of worship!
Oh sweet friend, how my heart needed to hear your words today. Thank you for your transparency and vulnerability here. I, too, have been in that place of saying, “They’ll see. They’ll be sorry.” Which is so ugly when we put those thoughts into words because they reek of pride and self-centeredness, shockingly clear in the words from Isaiah. Yet Father waits patiently for us to come back to Him and accept His good gifts, both the open and shut doors. Thank you for ministering to me (and us all) through this event and the heartbreak that followed. I’m with you here!
They do! I agree. Yuck! Let’s catch them Asheritah before they get too far! Thank you for sharing your heart with me today.
[…] with Kelly @Purposeful Faith, Crystal @Intentionally Pursuing, Holly @ #TestimonyTuesday, Jennifer Dukes Lee, Holley Gerth, […]
[…] Monday #Raralinkup Testimony […]
[…] I’m happy to share this post with the following linkups: Monday’s Musings / Inspire Me Monday / Living Proverbs 31 / Thank Goodness It’s Monday / Sweet To The Soul / #RaRalinkup […]
Kelly – You are so right God is always giving good gifts! and its our job to resist the devil when he wants to try and convince us that God doesn’t… great encouragement here to look beyond temporary disappointments.
Blessings to you 🙂
Let’s keep that devil far and our God ever-close!
Ditto to all that everyone has said about this post…but on to YAY Katie!!! Such a good fit…and an cheerleader indeed! Love her & you Friend!!!
Thanks Yolanda! I am delighted that Katie is joining and I am sure we will all be taught a lesson or two by God’s fantastic working in her life!
Thank you Yolanda- your beautiful bravery and fierce faith is a light to so many!
[…] blessed to share this post today with Kelly Balarie in her #RaRalinkup, join […]
[…] Linking up with Kelly Balarie: […]
[…] Linked to: SHINE Blog Hop, PinCrazy Thursday, It’s the Little Things, Modest Monday, Motivational Monday, Living Proverbs 31, Art of Home-Making Monday, Mom 2 Mom, Titus 2 Tuesday, Tuesday Talk, RaRaLinkup […]
[…] Kelly Balarie for #RaRaLinkup […]
Kelly, it always amazes me how similar the message is to your heart and mine. Once again our post echo with the same message! Last week and this I’ve written about how we are dealing with God saying “no” to some prayers in relation to my son’s cancer treatment. Sometimes that “no” is hard to accept! But God is good.
How neat Katie is a new regular here! As a fellow tightly wound woman, her words always resonate with me.
Lots of love to you both!
Jenni
Hi Jenni! From one Tightly Wound Woman to another, “I get you”. Sorry about the no’s but I know (as Jolene Underwoods says) thar His kindness is in the “no.” And it causes us to dig deep and is an opportunity to know Him better. Not easy but worth it. Hugs.
I can’t believe how much we are on the same wavelength, but I LOVE IT! Thanks for your excitement about Katie Jenni!
Yes! The Lord is preparing us for a tomorrow that is beyond our wildest dreams! I truly believe this. 🙂
Yes! Me too Lauren. I want to put it into action more and more.
Kelly, it’s taken me a long time to even begin to absorb all this truth, but the more I see it actually play out in my own life, the easier (well, less hard, anyway) it is to accept God’s “no’s.” I do feel your pain at having that opportunity jerked away, but I also appreciate your transparency in sharing what you learned through it. It’s a powerful, necessary message!
It can be so hard to feel like you are losing out, but God has us. Thank you for your super kind words to me Lois.
“My heart needs to learn a lesson in humility, so I can go to these places with stability.” Kelly, what a beautiful reminder that when we humble ourselves under God’s mighty hand and submit to His plan, He will bring us to places we could never get to on our own. And holding onto His hand and His plan will allow us to be His hands and His feet. : )
He has us and is taking us somewhere very special Crystal. He won’t let us go.
Once again thank you for your vulnerability so that we can be honest too and strengthened in the process. Yes, this: “Perhaps my greatest gift was found more in what I didn’t get, than what I did. For, what I didn’t get forged lessons and a heart condition that will last to eternity. What I could have gotten would have been done in a moment.” Important thoughts here, I needed this.
It is an honor to be real and open. I am glad it spoke to you Katie!
ah, how well I know that feeling of being overlooked. It happened to me more time than I’d like to remember…and most of the time, at least, the times that hit me hardest, were in the church. But like you, Kelly, I had to learn not only the art of graceful acceptance, but more importantly, the ability to be happy for the chosen one. It can only be done through the grace of God. Perhaps the Holy Spirit wants to use your “cheerleading” skills in this situation…THAT is really hard…but I’ve found that when I do that, something breaks in the spirit realm…another form of warfare…the devil hates when we don’t hold grudges. Well said, Kelly. God has big plans for you because He has a big heart and lots of room for all of us to serve Him!
Your words touch me deeply Mary, as they always do. It is so hard to be overlooked and to be hurt. I thank Jesus that his love pours into our every wound.
Hi Kelly! I know that God uses absolutely everything for our instruction and out good. But still it’s hard to take a ‘no’ answer. Especially when it looks so perfect. I’ve reacted the same way as you did. Anger, followed by confusion. Why am I sticking my neck out just to get chopped? Doesn’t make sense!
But as you said, maybe the blessing is in the ‘not getting’. Maybe you were shielded from a lot of useless energy? God has a better place for you! Believe that, because He will always use a heart that longs for Him.
I could really relate to your post today. And welcome to your new contributor 🙂
Ceil
I never really considered the energy output. That is a good point. Perhaps I would have been tapped out. Thank you for your wisdom!
Kelly, I think many of us can identify with being passed over while another was chosen. We think we could have done it so well. I know I’ve dealt with that in the past. But, if we keep our eyes on Christ His truth, as you said, then we will know we are right where we should be. He has us where He knows we need to be whether it is a place to encourage others, to learn something new, or to be silent for awhile. He loves us and that is a great truth. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing! May God continue to be with you and bless you!
Yes, being passed over hurts. It hits us right at the place of unworthiness. However, I never would have been able to write this post had I not gone through it. Don’t you love how God uses all things for good?
SO POWERFUL! How I have missed the blessing because I was stuck in my own anger, sadness, struggles of how I had thought, hoped, wished something would, should be.
I have been wonderfully encouraged, Kelly, not to miss but to have eyes open for God’s ways in my life.
Caring through Christ, ~ linda
Linda, I know what you mean. I have probably missed so much. I hope and pray I can see things differently and hold on to the truth next time. I hope you will too!
“He may not give me the good I want in today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.” So thankful that we have a Savior who is always looking out for what is best for us! We may not always see it…but some day we will know. 🙂
Thank you for hosting! So many great, encouraging posts are linked up.
We will know! I love that. Thank you for joining. I can’t wait to dive into encouragement.
Wow. I just sit here and keep saying, wow! How much your words tug away at the seams of pride and conceit that try to take over my heart, and my brain. That list above of God’s truth… that’s powerful, and you’re so right, the veil falls away, and attitude changes because of His sovereignty!
This has got to stop, my journal fills up weekly with quotes from your posts, girl! 🙂 Much love Kelly, blessings and hugs!
Christine, oh how I praise God that he spoke to the deep areas within you. But even more, I praise him that you are open to hear and to receive. He is doing some awesome work on you – of that I am confident.
Great words today Kelly. I can totally relate and I see myself there. Oh how hard it is to let go of what we want for what He knows is best, even when we can’t see it!
Thank you Kortney. It is so hard to let go of our things, to grab hold of his sometimes, isn’t it. May you be so abundantly blessed dear friend. I hope that you feel Jesus in your life in a mighty way!
Needed this encouragement today Kelly – In a world of comparison, aiming higher and self your words have been my words, we all face that weakness. Rejoicing with you that God’s answer was in fact a moment to grow in him – bless you for the amazing impact you have on us all here x
Tania, I am honored to be used to bring you this encouragement. This weakness hurts, but Jesus’ love heals. Thank you for being open and for sharing how this post hit you. You bless me.
Kelly,
What true and powerful words in your post…Thank you…and delighted to hear Katie will be part of the team…you’re both such encouraging and truth filled writers 🙂
Dolly- thank you. I appreciate both your writing and kindness.
Thank you Dolly! I am super excited about Katie too!
Kelly, your words go straight to my heart. Very soon,I may find myself in the very same position. Without a doubt, God has recently called me to speak. When one of the ministries that I write for opened a door for speakers, I stepped forward. They are praying about decisions, and I am waiting. I will remember your words. Thank you Kelly!
Oh Carolyn, what an honor to be used to speak words that hit your heart. You cannot even begin to know the joy I feel. Thank you for sharing this with me. I am praying, right now, for your future speaking ministry!
Well done Kelly! I can only imagine how much of a time investment raralinkup has become for you. I’m thankful that Katie is coming alongside in unity and support. Praying for both of you and all that this ministry will become!!
Thank you Meg- your prayers are greatly appreciated!
Thanks so much for the linkup and for the reminder that God’s ways aren’t always ours, but they are always better.
May He continue to fill your cup to overflowing!
Thank you Heather. I greatly appreciate you joining us!
[…] Inspired Wednesdays, Women With Intention Wednesdays, Grace & Truth, A Little R & R, RaRa Link-Up, Dance With Jesus, Blessing Counters, Coffee & Conversation, Saturday […]
Wow. Needed to hear this in this moment for so many different reasons, really. This is the line that grabbed me: “He has given me a chance to be a foot warrior of contentment in the face of opposition and defeat. That is powerful.” Yes, absolutely yes! I want to be that foot warrior! Blessings from “Espressos of Faith”!
Yes! Be the foot warrior. Rise up to go out! Cheering you Bonnie!
[…] https://www.purposefulfaith.com/when-god-doesnt-give/ […]
Kelly-
There you go again reading my thoughts… Lol The struggle is. Real.
Oh, for that day in glory when we see His face and our striving is over.
Why do I feel like I should have opportunities it experience disappointment when I am not used by God in the way that makes me feel valued. Ugly flesh.
My value is ever settled in Christ. The end.
And kudos to Katie! She’s a blessing! I am just happy to have some small interaction with you sweet God-Lovin’ ladies!
You are both a blessing-and the #RaraLinkup crew too!
*and not, not it COPY EDITOR??!! lol 😉
Totally ok. I am the worst at grammar! No judgement here.
What a gift you are Christy! We get each other. The struggle is the struggle and we know that Jesus will bring us through. Thanks for celebrating with Katie too. You are the best Christy.
Yup…it’s so hard when we are tasting and seeing and then, gone. Nothing like what we want being taken away to quickly rid us of that spirit of entitlement and pride. God is so faithful to bring us to our knees when we most need to be there, right? So glad He cares enough to choose, remove, and write His very best over our lives. Thank you for sharing this much needed, heart resonating encouragement, Kelly.
I am so grateful too Tiffany. I am so grateful that he gives me his best, instead of what I think is best!
Kelly, I couldn’t help hearing Lysa TerKeurst’s word from The Best Yes … A no is a protection of your Best Yes! You are so right that: “He may not give me the good I want in today, because he is preparing great for tomorrow.” I have had those tantrums more than once over the past few years especially as the Lord has called for me to take more and more steps of faith. I am so thankful that He doesn’t give up on me but continues to pursue and steer me gently back into the line of His Will!
Thank you for being an incredible encourager of faith and for #RaRaLinkUp!
… and YAY Katie!!! 😀
Sarah, your words are so encouraging. He has us. I want to preserve my best time for him – just like you said! Thank you Jesus for ever-steering us!
Welcome Katie and uh, yeah. Goodness, such conviction has fallen on me. Thanks so much for the transparency. Kelly, your are truly our head cheerleader! Bringing good, hearty food to your table for us to dine on. Love me some #raralinkup!
[…] R Wednesdays, Christian Mommy Blogger, Grace & Truth, Women With Intention Wednesdays, RaRa Link-Up, Saturday Soiree, So Much at Home, and Coffee and […]
[…] with The Time Warp Wife, Purposeful Faith, Cornerstone Confessions, A Little […]
[…] blog today as we discuss sinful anger and God’s kindness. P.P.S Linking up with Kelly for #RaRaLinkup (a special announcement over there today!) and Holly for […]
[…] There was a special announcement over on Kelly’s blog. I am delighted to be a monthly contributor to her site. I’d love to connect with you over […]
Thank you for sharing your experience. I am guilty of the “Why not me?” But by and by, I understand God’s power will reign in my life and His merciful heart will explain/show my true desires each and every time.
Thank you for commenting. God’s ways are so much more intricate and well planned than ours. So much always revolves back to faith, doesn’t it?
[…] Kelly Balarie for #RaRaLinkup […]
Hi again, Kelly. I’ve just discovered your site a few hours ago, and in reading a few of your posts, you’ve already helped me so much with my struggles. I’ve been waiting for healing from chronic illness for 20 years and have recently been discouraged from unanswered prayers (as I mentioned in another comment from another post). Thank you, dear sister, for what you do. The more I read your posts, the more I can see how the Lord has shaped you through your own struggles and now He uses that to help others. I’m praying for the Lord to continue to bless all that you put your hand to for His glory. I’m sending a hug of gratitude to you and want you to know that I appreciate you! God bless you.
Thank you Kelly
Hi there, I would like to subscribe for this blog to obtain most up-to-date updates, therefore where can i do
it please help out.
“God doesn’t want us reliant on opportunities, he want’s us reliant on him – the King.”
I really needed to read this today, as it clearly states how I’ve been a little misguided hoping for opportunities to turn my life around. It is God who will do this, not opportunities! Thank you for sharing!