Marcia Kuyper is joining us today for Women’s Ministry Monday and, boy, am I delighted about it. Her words struck a chord with my heart. They are both encouraging and thought-provoking. I am confident they will bless you as much as they did me. Enjoy!
Post by: Marcia Kuyper
I could see he was annoyed with me.
My husband Tom set our vitamins out on the counter, and I, knowing a better system, “politely” questioned his arrangement.
The tension was subtle, but I was keenly aware of his frustration with me. It makes me mad when he gets annoyed with me. I was thinking, “What right does he have to be irritated with me, after the way he hurt me?”
I say out loud, “You are so bugged with me.”
My conflict avoiding husband gave it to me straight. He courageously began to tell me about the way I affect him. I knew he was talking about more than the arrangement of vitamins. He was talking about our life together.
I didn’t want it to be about me.
I looked down at my Bible, which was open to Luke, and I paused, asking Jesus to help me have ears to hear. “Lord, help me listen, truly listen. Help me listen for what’s being said beneath the words. Let me listen the way you listen… love the way you love… lay down my life the way you laid down your life.”
I looked at the words before me in Luke 7:36-50…
“And Jesus answered him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he replied, “Say it, Teacher.”
And I hear it loud and clear…
“Marcia, I have something to say to you.” I pause…ask again for His help in my listening, and then I reply,
“Say it Teacher.”
I’ve read this so many times. I get the meaning of these words, but this time, His message hits home in a more personal way.
To love the way Jesus loves,
I must receive all the love and forgiveness He offers.
I must let the blood of the Lamb cleanse me from ALL unrighteousness,
which includes my SELF-righteousness.
I’m listening, so He gently shows me that I am the pharisee in this story.
I realized I was saying : “I would never do that.”
I didn’t say it out loud, but in my heart, I was saying, “I would never do that.”
It’s pride. I hold on to a small sense of superiority, and that is what comes out when pressed.
Tom was courageously being more direct and bold, because he loves me and values our relationship. I was tempted to react in a self-protective way, turning the fault back on him, but this time, by God’s grace, I was able to have ears to hear what He wanted to teach me. I am learning that, until I own my part, until I own my sin – my inability to come under him, my resistance to letting him lead me, to learn from him, to listen without pushing my words – we will only get so far.
Is there something God wants to say to you?
With Jesus as our teacher and guide, like the woman in Luke 7:36-50, we have the opportunity to let Jesus love us fully by giving Him access into every corner of our lives. Even the things we don’t speak out loud. It is here, in this place of admission and confession, where we experience His loving forgiveness and respond with extravagant gratefulness, just like this exposed woman did.
She, the woman, poured out her most costly possession (perfume), He poured out His blood for our redemption. As I wrestled with Jesus over my unforgiveness, He helped me identify and spill out my pride, which released in me an outpouring of love and forgiveness for Tom. What might your spontaneous outpouring of gratitude look like?
May you receive His love and forgiveness today in a way that overflows in love, forgiveness and gratitude.
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About Marcia Kuyper
Marcia Kuyper is the Women’s Ministries director at Open Door Fellowship Church in Phoenix Arizona. She leads Bible studies and Retreats, counsels couples and women in marriage and family and has a deep passion for God’s Word and His people
Marcia teaches with her husband at the A Time for Us Marriage retreats and Marriage preparation classes for engaged couples. She also shepherds and teaches a class for young marrieds and singles called C’est La Vie.
Marcia is a wife to Tom, mom of four, and grandma to seven, soon to be eight…
She spends a lot of time… planning vacations. 🙂 She loves reading… (Favorite authors: Oswald Chambers, Henri Nouwen, Elizabeth Goudge… too many to list.) the beach, snow skiing…
Raised in a Jewish family, Marcia came to know Jesus as Savior in high school. She is so deeply grateful that Jesus pursues her and never stops loving her.