Category - faith

Never left Alone

November 4, 2022

“You don’t understand.”

We’ve probably all thought this thought one time or another. Someone gives us advice that does not resonate… Another thinks we’re doing something that we’re not even doing… People misinterpret our motives or our words…

They don’t understand. We feel alone and by ourselves.

It certainly has happened to me in marriage. At times, I have said one thing and my husband has heard a whole other thing. I am misunderstood. I am sure that I misunderstand him too, sometimes.

In this case, when I feel all alone, it is easy for me to think, “Who is fighting for me? Who understands me?” It’s easy to sink deep down into a cave of sadness all alone and to believe that I have to: 1. fend for myself 2. make sure I am going to be okay 3. lick my wounds.

Have you ever been there too? Felt unprotected? Undefended?

This verse is encouraging, “But the Lord is faithful; he will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.” (2 Thessalonians 3:3)

In tough moments, we can gain hope by remembering that God isn’t leaving us, but He is strengthening us. He isn’t unstable and unavailable, He is faithful. God is with us.

When the enemy sets schemes in relationships, even then, God guards us from them.

We are not left alone; we are protected.

When we don’t know what to do, Jesus intercedes for us (Heb. 7:25). When we don’t think there’s anyone fending for us we have an advocate in Jesus (1 Jo. 2:1).

“Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” (Ro. 8:26)

In tough moments, we can keep our thoughts and our feelings out of dark, isolating and mentally draining places by remembering: we are never alone because God is with us. Not only is God with us, but God is for us, too. He is actively helping us in whatever we are going through.

Prayer: Father God, I need you to fight my battle for me. I give up the fight, so you can fight on my behalf. Forgive me for believing that I am alone. Forgive me for believing that I am left behind by you in any way, shape or form. You are for me. Thank you. Jesus advocates for me. Thank you. You are with me always. Help me to remember these things in tough moments. Help me to put all my trust in you. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Handling Triggers

October 28, 2022

purposefulfaith

attack, awe, faith

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Have you ever felt like a horrible person? A horrible mom? A horrible friend? Two days ago, I was a horrible mom for a second — or, truthfully, for about 2-hours.

My son said to me, “I can’t tell you the things I tell daddy! I’m not telling you anything!!”

My insides boiled at this comment; my son had hit a nerve. All I want is for my son to know he can share anything with me. I want to be close to him. I want him to know I am safe. But now he’s saying I am not good enough and that I am not safe. Ahh!!! I felt panic come on me. My inside was triggered with, “Fix this! Fix this! Fix this, Kelly! You are not a good mom. You are messing things up. Fix this!” Overwhelmed by my emotions, and the fear I couldn’t make my son want me, I blamed him for my feelings.

I said to him, “You are dishonoring and disrespecting your mom. You are grounded entirely until you can respect me.”

Immediately, after I demanded it, I felt the heavy weight of shame. I can’t demand people love me or ground them until they do. I can’t yell at someone to be close to me — that doesn’t work. More upset at myself, I got more upset.

I yelled up the stairs, “And, stay up in your room too! And, write me a note of what you did wrong.”

Then, I hated myself for saying it.

Alone with my daughter now, I admitted to her, “I am just angry at myself for how I am handling things.”

She wisely said, “Why don’t you just apologize?” So, I did. I apologized to my son that I got triggered. I apologized that I reacted. I apologized that I took my fear out on him.

Later, upon reflection, I had to recognize that a thousand levels deeper than his hurtful comment, was me — a little girl who felt unwanted again. A little girl who was often left sitting on the sidewalk at school while the other kids played together. I don’t want to be unwanted again. I hate that feeling.

And, that’s why I got triggered. I got triggered because I am afraid of being an abysmal failure. Left, by the ones I love most.

But, if I had stopped and paused in the heat of the moment? If I had reflected I might have been able to see things differently. I might have been able to think about God’s Word to me. What would God say?

I think He might say to me:
Kelly, “There is no one righteous, not even one.” (Ro. 3:10)
And I might have realized: Everyone makes mistakes.

Kelly, “Even before (I) made the world, God loved (you) and chose (you) in Christ to be holy and without fault in (my) eyes.” (Eph. 1:4)
And I might have realized: I’m am chosen, holy and faultless in Christ Jesus. I can move back to a firm standing and positioning in Christ, and out of shame.

Kelly, “His divine power has given (you) everything (you) need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called (you) by his own glory and goodness.” (2 Pet. 1:3)
And I might have realized: I am being called right now by God’s goodness to bring God glory. By His power, there is a better way that I can walk even though I feel triggered.

If I had paused, and hid-out in a closet or something, I could have returned back to Father God’s loving arms and found a more sound, biblical way of thinking. I could have prayed about next steps. I could have calmed down. Unfortunately, I didn’t. But, next time, I will.

I will because situations don’t define me; the Word of My God does! To get to His Word is to find power. This is how in horrible, no good, rotten situations I will — rise up, strong! It is how I will show love even when I feel hurt. It is how triggers won’t rule me.

What about you — what triggers try to rule you? What boils your blood? What is God’s truth to you? How might His Word console what hurt rests under the surface of your pain.

We truly do have all we need to walk out a godly life, sometimes we just have to pause enough to receive it and to believe it! How do you make room to hear the Lord when the world feels like it is falling on you? How can you calm yourself enough to breathe in His love when the going gets tough?

Prayer: God, help! Help me when temptation comes. Help me when the going gets tough. You say, there is always a door of escape. Show me the door. Show me the way. Show me the paths of grace and life. I thank you that you are always there to help me. Lead me in all your ways. Lead me in the way of love. Heal my inner pain. Heal my sadness. Heal rejection. Heal anger and bitterness. I want to love you and others with all my heart. Grow me in your love. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Dust off Hurtful Words + Carry on!

October 18, 2022

purposefulfaith

awe, faith, grace, hope

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When I walk, I am not scared of bugs. I know I walk above them. When I walk though my front yard, I don’t consider what bugs may be underground; I just walk. I am not afraid, I go! I walk above problems. I walk over scary things. I move, anyway.

To be above what lurks, is a big deal. It means you walk fearlessly.
Do you realize that we sit above the mayhem of the world?

“And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus…” (Eph. 2:6)

“Even as [in His love] He chose us [actually picked us out for Himself as His own] in Christ before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy (consecrated and set apart for Him) and blameless in His sight, even above reproach, before Him in love.”

We are above what issues lurk below. We are above the world that demands constant attention. We are above powers and principalities of the unseen realm because we sit with Jesus.

Even more, we are “even above reproach”. Do you know what “reproach” means?

American Webster Dictionary defines “reproach” as : “To express disapproval of, criticism of, or disappointment in (someone).
Friend, you are above disapproval, criticism, or disappointment.

This is a big deal. It means that people can’t squash you with words. They can’t ruin you with bad actions. The old labels cannot stick any longer. You, my dear one, sit above that. You are over that, with Jesus.

All that cannot hold you back any longer!

Remember where you sit, my friend. Stay all your mind above all that — whether it happened yesterday or today! Give it no claim to yourself. Despise the shame, just like Jesus did (see Heb. 12:2)! You are “before Him in love”.

It means everything to be seated with Jesus! It’s a powerful position.

Prayer: I pray, today, I feel and experience the love of God. I pray that you open the eyes of my heart, Father God, to know the hope of my glorious inheritance and the riches in Christ Jesus. I pray that I gain understanding of where I sit and whom I am seated with. I pray that you give me power to live from that place. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Trusting When Life is Hard

October 7, 2022

purposefulfaith

faith, hope, Love & Health

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What do we do when we can’t seem to trust? When worry hits us in the gut?

I can’t say I have all the answers. There are some moments when the fear of what could be, or what isn’t, or what hasn’t — comes in like a flood. There are also moments where worst case scenarios have overtaken me.

God knows, I am not perfect and life is hard. Situations get hard. People get hard.

At the same time, these verses serve as an anchor on those hard sorts of days:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart;
do not depend on your own understanding.
Seek his will in all you do,
and he will show you which path to take.

Don’t be impressed with your own wisdom.
Instead, fear the Lord and turn away from evil.
Then you will have healing for your body
and strength for your bones.

Honor the Lord with your wealth
and with the best part of everything you produce.
Then he will fill your barns with grain,
and your vats will overflow with good wine.” (Prov. 3:5-10)

They say to me:

You don’t have to know the way, Kelly. God does.

It’s not your wisdom that will save you anyway. It’s God’s wisdom.

When you fear God, there’s no room left to fear man.

When you are on your last leg, there — in that very needy place — God comes in with strength.

When you haven’t the faintest idea how you will make it — God makes wisdom come to you.

Sometimes life hits hard. But, when we lose it all, when it all crumbles, when we don’t know, when we can’t think — God doesn’t leave us empty handed. He is there. He is present. He is ready to help.

Do not lose hope, even if you have no idea, no wisdom or no understanding — even then, God will direct your path and give you wisdom.

Prayer: God, in you we do not fear, for your love, help, and grace are near. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Side Note: Friends, I will be speaking at the Prism conference near Fort Lauderdale, Florida next week. If you live in the area, I would love to meet you.

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Faith Beyond What’s Comfortable

September 29, 2022

purposefulfaith

faith, grace, hope

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I don’t like feeling in need. I like to have everything together. I like being the strong one. I like having the right word for the right person at the right time. I like giving. I like handling things well. I like knowing what my day holds. I like convenience. I like knowing what is happening.

Knowing things makes me feel good. Having a handle on life makes me feel comfortable.

But, is comfort what Jesus was after?

I bet many of the disciples didn’t feel comfortable when they left their fishing business behind to follow Jesus.

I bet Paul felt anything but comfortable when he fell off that horse and went blind for three days.

I bet Jesus didn’t feel comfortable when He walked down Calvary Road with a cross.

There are times where the Lord permits a shaking up of our proverbial snow globes in life — to loose us from comfort zones. The Lord, in His All-Knowingness, uses discomfort and awkwardness to provoke great need for Him. Here, rather than relying on our way, our sufficiency, our greatness and our known — we run to rely on Him.

These uncomfortable times of awkwardness can be times of great acceleration if received with open hearts and hands. They can walk us into the greatest, most glorious adventures of life, if we take the risk — to go there with God.

But, not all are willing to go the uncomfortable distance. Not all say yes…to the call, to shedding weight for His great…

Jesus answered (the rich man), ‘If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.’

When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.” (Mt. 19:21-22)

The rich man did not follow Jesus because he was comfortable.

What a pity it is to deny Jesus, to keep comfort.

For “…to live is Christ and to die is gain.” (Phil. 1:21) Dying to ourselves is not always comfortable, but it is always worth it. Jesus, as The Prince of Peace has peace for us, no matter how hard the bridge there looks. And, all His paths lead to life, for Jesus is Life (see Jo. 14:6). No matter how unorthodox it seems, when Jesus is in it we will find both life and peace when we walk through it with Him. He is true to His nature.

With all this, take courage, my friends, as you walk in these hard places. Gain hope! If Christ has overcome the world (Jo. 16:33), surely He can overcome what you face as you go with Him. He is faithful. Truly, I tell you: You “can do all things through Him who gives you strength.” (Phil. 4:13)

Reflect:
What discomfort may God be using to further holiness, endurance or perseverance in your life?

How might the shaking be making you more into the image of Christ?

How might God be calling you out and will you obey?

Prayer:

Father God, great is your faithfulness. You are so trustworthy. You are so good. You are so mighty. I thank You for Your Son, Jesus. He is worthy of all my life, all my devotion and all my obedience. I ask You for all the grace I need to follow Him. Whether it is to step out into a new calling, out of sin, or into a time of growth through circumstances, I ask for Your equipping and empowerment. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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3 Ways to Love God More

September 21, 2022

purposefulfaith

faith, Love & Health

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I say after a scrumptious dinner to my friend, “Let me get those dishes for you.” I then proceed to clean the whole table, scrub every dish, get everything dried off and put into place. Pans are cleaned. Pots are put back away.

That friend looks up and says, “Thanks, Kelly.”

Yet, for another friend, on a different night, I do the same thing. Her response? “Wow, Kelly. You are amazing. I feel so loved and so appreciated. I am so thankful. I am so touched.”

What’s the difference? The difference is loving people the way they feel loved. After reading the book, The Five Love Languages, I learned there are five ways people feel loved: Acts of service, quality time, gift-giving, words of affirmation or physical touch. When you nail the love language, the person is hit with a jolt of love.

What is God’s love language?

Jesus said, “’Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ (Mt. 22:37)

But, how do we love God the way He wants to be loved?

Here are 3 Ways to Love God His way:

1. Have a Need for His Love
Friends, God is love. He is the complete sum of love. Love is a fruit of His Spirit. If we do not rest in His love, receive His love and relish in His love, we will not understand love. In this case we may resort to love as a flesh-focused obligation or duty, but miss the Holy Spirit prompted sort of love, that comes from God.

“We love because he first loved us.” (1 Jo. 4:19)

Are you spending time with the Lord?

2. Obey His Commands

Love will last to eternity and so will our obedience. Because, obedience is love.

When my kids obey me, I feel loved. They listen. They know I am their mom. They care about my words. Likewise, when we obey, we not only honor God, but we love Him.

Do you seek to obey God, no matter the cost?

“If you love me, keep my commands.” (Jn 14:15)

3. Receive His Sacrifice Continually

“But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Ro. 5:8)

Apart from Jesus, we are nothing. We bring no value, no good, and no work that is worthy. Often, we mess up. We may try not to sin and then we do. We may try to obey and then we fall short.

The beauty here?

Jesus. He shows His love for us — through the cross — even while we are sinning, He forgives. He gives us a blank slate, again. He offers us a second chance, or a 30,000th chance.

God’s continual love for us turns into our continual love for Him. How could a love this divine save us again? We worship. We give thanks. We love Him all the more, because His love is so extravagant.

Prayer: Father, we love you. We thank you. We praise you. You are everything. We ask that we could love you from deeper depths. Would you pour out your love upon us? Would you fill us with your love so we can love you and others more? In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Overcoming on Hard Days

September 2, 2022

purposefulfaith

awe, Contentment, faith

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I said to the pilot, “What is the best learning you have from flying high in the skies?”

His answer, “There is always, always, sun above the rain clouds. If it looks dark and dim when you take off, you just have to go higher. There, the sun is bright!”

The man had a point. What he said was not only a lesson in the natural, but in the spiritual. Above every dark cloud of uncertainty about the future, above every relational problems, above financial concerns, above health issues, remains the Son. The glorious, bright and ever awe-inspiring Son.

When we fly higher than problems, we see Him. The Sovereign One is always reigning when it is raining.

But, so often, my problem is — I don’t look up. Friends, while it is hard to admit, in recent days, I have made a habit of looking at the rain, more than the Rain Maker. Internally, I keep griping, “Ugh, isn’t this over yet? How long can I take going through this?”

I see what hasn’t happened.
I look at what isn’t right.
I see what people aren’t doing.
I am upset at what I am not doing.

Somewhere along the line, I got earthly-focused instead of heavenly-minded. The result? Faith dwindled. Frustration mounted. Anxiety increased. I worried. I sinned.

I sinned by taking my eyes off of God and putting them onto my problems, people and circumstances.

We are told not to do this:

“So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” (2 Cor. 4:8 NLT)

“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” (Col. 3:2 NIV)

When we set our mind above, we remember King of Kings and the Lord of Lords reigns above it all! When we fix our eyes on Him, we see His glory and power despite our problems and issues. When we think about heavenly things; love comes in right order.

How have you been focusing on what is earthly, instead of Him, who is heavenly? How might you need to let go of your grasp of worry, for the better gain of knowing and loving Him?

Prayer: Father, I thank you for every single person here. I thank you that you know what each and every person is going through. Jesus, you understand the hardships. You empathize. You know. I also ask that you would give us a grace to keep our heart and minds set on you. I ask that you would equip us to rise above problems and people and to glorify your name. Forgive us of self-focus and self-pity. Give us mouths of praise and eyes love. Give us faith and hope. Give us the ability to keep our eyes on you. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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When You Want To Fix Things

July 14, 2022

purposefulfaith

faith, grace, hope

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As a mom, it is so easy to keep a mental tally of what the family needs. My son needs new shin guards after practice today. My daughter needs the light turned off on the remote and not on the wall at the end of the night. My husband needs a good dinner.

I anticipate needs and I help.

How might you, like me, anticipate needs? How might you step in to help people when they are down? How might you do for others what they need help doing? How might you emotionally cover others when they are down? How might you step in to save people?

I have tended to think, some of me – added to what others need – makes for a good result. But lately, Christ has been reminding me, Jesus needs none of me, to release the goodness of all of Him.

I cannot help Jesus save me, or others. Only Jesus is Savior.

I cannot add to what He is doing. Only when I move my flesh out of His Way, will He move.

I am unwise to step in between a family member and what God is doing. I am unwise to fix and give advice. I am unwise to stop the process of growth that happens through struggle. This is often pride.

“And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12)

When I move into Savior position, I may not even realize that I have a savior-complex. When I get a savior-complex I fix what God alone can work out. When I let my emotions move me more than my trust in God’s ever-working saving power, I get confused, frustrated and upset at people who are trying to work things out with God.

Where are we stepping in when God may be calling us to step out – and pray? Where are we moving by a need to be wanted or valued more than by the Holy Spirit? And, how might we be halting the move of God wanting to move in the lives of those we love.

We are not saviors; there is only One Savior. Let’s turn to Him. He will take care of us. He is the Ultimate Defender and the Best Protector! He has all we need – and all they need too!

Prayer: Father, I confess today my own need for you. Sometimes, I get scared and want to take things into my own hands. I confess I can even use religious words or techniques to accomplish what you want to do. Help me to make room for you in my life and in the lives of those I love. Help me not to step in, to blurt out, or to move in, before you call me to. I trust you to save. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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Giving is Receiving

June 18, 2022

purposefulfaith

blessings, faith, Freedom

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Do you have a thing you get really excited for?

Coffee is my thing! I love a good latte. Add in some vanilla or caramel syrup and my heart is happy. Add whipped cream and my joy-levels go over the moon.

About a week ago, my husband, two kids, and I drove down a long rock road, flying up a whole lot of dust on our car, to reach a café tucked back in the woods. I knew soon I’d have that first sip. But, when we got to the cash register, an issue popped up: we didn’t bring enough cash. After my kids’ treats, my husband’s coffee and my latte, we were .50 cents short. Something would have to go…

“I’ll skip my latte.” I told the cashier.

I turned, walked away, completely okay with the loss and sat down.

“(Love) does not insist on its own way,” (1 Cor. 13:5 ESV).

At the same time, I watched my husband mouth something to the cashier. I knew what he was up to! He was giving up his coffee so I could have my latte! My heart jumped at his desire to love me. I felt so cared for. God was providing for me after all.

We all sat down with our treats and I relished in my sugary drink. Yum. Two seconds later, the waitress came over and placed something down in front of my husband, Emanuel. “You get one too – for free!”

Wow! God blessed my husband.

What we lay down for another, God will always pick up and handle. It may not always come in a financial blessing or an immediate gift, but we cannot lay something down without Father God seeing, knowing and taking care of us – as we lay down ourselves, as a drink offering in His hands.

I love how God encouraged us all in this way. We laid down our right, and then God picked up our fight, even for something as seemingly meaningless as our coffee.

He loves us that much. He loves you that much.

What might God be calling you to lay down – so He can pick it up?

Prayer: Father, sometimes it is so hard to lay down to you, especially when we want to cling and hold on to what is known. Help us to lay down our lives knowing that you will pick up our cause, fight for us and protect us. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

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Can I Trust You?

May 27, 2022

purposefulfaith

envy, faith, hope

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There are people I do not share my hard times with. Of course, I share these times with you all! I love opening up to you (plus, you all listen so well). Thank you for being amazing. Thank you for all the prayers you’ve prayed over the years. I pray for you too.

But, like I said, there are people I don’t share with. Why?

The people I don’t share hard stories and deep emotions with, tend to:
– turn the story back around to themselves, ignoring my heart issue.
– put down what I have shared, telling me, “That’s not a big deal.”
– immediately go to advice-giving.
– spread my story to other people.
– judge me when I am talking.
– not empathize or show any compassion.

Unfortunately, because I repeatedly give unsafe people the benefit of the doubt — I’ve gotten hurt, repeatedly. After a lot of hurt, one must learn. Wise people use discernment in what they share and with whom they share it with.

Have you been hurt by people’s responses too?

“Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.” (Mt. 7:6)

I forgive people, for they know not what they do — and, usually, they are really trying their best. I take responsibility. I cannot continually go to a well that does not have living water flowing from it.

At the same time, it makes me think — how do I respond to people?
– Am I quick to listen and slow to speak?
– Do I reserve judgment?
– Do I stay calm and patient in the process of their sharing?

I can’t say it is always great (especially with my kids). I too, need help in the “truly-listening” department.

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” (Ja. 1:19)

A few words can make a huge impact. It is not the wisdom that I carry; it is the heart that God wants us to bring.

What if I were to listen from the heart? What if we were to be the safe people? How might God use us?

Prayer: God, help me! Help me to be quick to listen and slow to speak. Help me to ditch anger, for love. Father? I also forgive those who have dissed me when I was sharing. I let them off the hook. Give me wisdom in whom to share with and whom not to. I love you, always and forever. You are my King! You are Lord! You are my everything. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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